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You ask posters not to make replies that just "second" another post. Voting the post "up" is another way to do something when you are very favorably impressed. But I always am told I have used up my daily allotment of votes...what gives? Mindy

That option is disabled by default. I assume that it will stay that way unless some future forum-admin decides to change it.

With all due respect I have to disagree with this response. Particularly when strong emotions are involved it is possible even for rational people to drop context or be confused about where their moral obligations lie. My wife and I fell in love over a period of about six months, while she still considered herself to be engaged to her then-current boyfriend. Our situation was quite similar to the one Ben described -- she was more attracted to me, but felt an obligation to her fiance; sex was involved, etc. Ultimately she decided to break up with him and we got married a couple of years later -- and still are, 14 years later, quite happily. You don't have enough information about this girl and the situation to pass such a sweeping judgment on her character. My suggestion to Ben is to help her see that she should pursue her own happiness. Staying in a relationship with a man she doesn't love out of a sense of obligation is just going to make both of them miserable. But she has to decide herself. You can make your interest clear, but she has to decide how best to pursue her own happiness. If she decides, in the fullness of time, that she doesn't want to be with you, accept it and move on. You should not enable her to believe that she can have both you and her current relationship by postponing the decision indefinitely. You want an exclusive relationship with her; you aren't willing to settle for less, and you shouldn't have to. That's your choice.

To use the multiquote feature, click the button corresponding to the message(s) you would like to quote in your response. You can even browse to other pages in the thread, and you can even browse to other threads, and the multiquote feature will keep tracking you. When you finally click "Add Reply" at the bottom of any thread, you will be taken to a new text editor box, and the quotations will already appear in the editor with "quote tags" around each message you've decided to quote. If you want to insert extra quote tags, you can simply put text around the string of symbols [ q u o t e ] and [ / q u o t e ], where all spaces are omitted. To play with this, in order to see how it works, see what happens when you post the following text, removing the appropriate spaces: This is a [ q u o t e] quote [ / q u o t e ] Note that you can always post something and then edit it within a few minutes of having posted it, so in order to keep the forum tidy, please edit out your experiments with the quote tags and only leave your response.

Ben: That must not be a recent pic in your profile. Clearly, you've had the word "SUCKER" tattooed across your forehead. You do not know what another person is feeling; you only know what they tell you. (Read that statement 40-100 times until you get it.) When a person demonstrates in action that they have no integrity — when they are willing to lie to and deceive people whom they claim to love — why would you believe them about anything? It can be a challenge to remain in objective control when your feelings are overwhelming you. If you heard the kinds of statements coming from this lady spoken by anyone else, would they make the slightest bit of sense? What would it would mean to remain in a romantic relationship out of a sense of "obligation"? I have a suspicion that this lady is a master of having her cake and eating it, too. Don't tell me about a person's positive qualities when they're a deceptive liar — particularly in the romantic realm. Integrity is fundamental; to the extent she has brains and is likable, that only makes her more dangerous. You're sexually gone over this woman and it's frying your intellect.

Are you against the article because of something in particular that you read, or simply because it says "David Kelley" and "Chris Sciabarra" at the bottom?