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Nicky

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Nicky last won the day on August 13

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  1. Nicky

    Why are men's clothing so boring?

    Stopped reading, sorry. As fascinating as it would be to find out what I believe from a stranger who seems to be upset with me for some reason, I have a very important youtube video to watch. It has guinea pigs in it.
  2. Nicky

    Why are men's clothing so boring?

    In my experience (as an observer...I'm a man), a woman living up to the expectations of even just her middle class social circle, using cosmetics, beauty products, bathing products, various services she pays for, and clothing and jewelry she has to pick out and pay for, takes massive amounts of resources and know how, that is developed through painstaking practice (and learning from the time she is a young girl, from other women). And, on top of that, routine work...an average of 20-25 hours/month, easy, once you add it all up. And once it's upper class expectations, we're talking at least a couple of people drawing a salary from maintaining one rich woman's appearance. Meanwhile, I groom and dress to standards I'm expected to groom and dress to, and it takes maybe 5 hours/month. And it's basic stuff you can learn from a youtube video, like how to dye your hair (I'm prematurely graying), cut your beard, or shave your privates without slicing anything you (might) need off. So yes, it's a waste of resources that could be turned towards a far more useful hobby. While girls learn how to dress and make up, which is not a particularly useful skill in the workplace, boys practice leadership and team work through sports, learn musical instruments, work on buying and maintaining their first car, learn how to use and program computers, etc., etc., and, in my mind, this at least partially explains the pay gap between the genders.
  3. Nicky

    Korzybski vs. Rand

    I'm sorry, but I'm a little confused. So, the only question originally posed in this thread has been answered: no one here has heard about this Korzybski fella' before. Asked and answered. So that should've been the end of the thread. But fine, I guess it's not. We had a change of subject. I'm flexible, I'm fine with a change of subject...as long as someone points out what the new subject is. So what's the new subject?
  4. A simple way of doing what I suggested is having coffee with someone. It's a few basic steps: 1. you suggest to a person that you should have coffee together 2. walk to a coffee shop together (or separately, if you weren't together) 3. find a table and order coffee (or the other way around, depends on the place) 4. drink the coffee 5. say goodbye Are you saying that you find some of that daunting, or don't know how to do it? Which part?
  5. I didn't suggest you move on from anything. My advice, that you should improve your communication, interaction, dating and relationship skills through practice with whoever is willing to go out with you, has nothing to do with moving on. You should do that for the sake of becoming a better person, not for any other purpose. That's irrelevant. Rational people don't just do what they feel interested in (that is whim worship, entirely antithetical to Reason), they try to act on what they rationally determine is in their best interest. Do you agree that improving yourself in this area of life is in your best interest? If so, will you try and do it?
  6. Nicky

    Donald Trump

    A high ranking White House official wrote a little essay on the subject of this thread: https://www.nytimes.com/2018/09/05/opinion/trump-white-house-anonymous-resistance.html He didn't leave his name, which should only fuel Trump's paranoia about his subordinates undermining him. Best quote: Another quote: This is not a liberal. It's not a Democrat. This is a conservative Republican. One of many, sitting in a position of power, waiting for the right time to finally end this absurdity.
  7. Well, that is Trump's position. I doubt it was the position of these Republican voters before Trump entered politics, and it's unlikely that it will stay their position after he leaves. These people are simply followers, who cannot think for themselves, but are able to identify with a group (Republicans, because it's a far more white group than the other one, and, in the absence of abstract thinking, they need a concrete, obvious trigger for their affiliation...skin color works well for this), and take on the ideas of the loudest voice within it. I don't see much chance that this point of view will remain the loudest voice in the Republican Party, once Trump is gone. At that point, these followers will simply follow the next person to become the loudest voice...likely someone far more principled than Trump (who is the first, and hopefully last, entirely amoral President of the United States).
  8. What about the advice? Have you understood any of it (meaning, have you understood why it was given)? Have you tried any of it? Has any of it helped you in any way, so far? Just so you know: the most important, in fact I would say crucial, advice you received in this thread (you got it from multiple people, not just me) was to try and date others (without necessarily giving up on this girl)...because you don't seem very good at romantic relationships, and the only way to get good at something is through practice. Have you made any progress on that front? Have you tried? Do you intend to try?
  9. Nicky

    Life is the necessary value - but why is it sufficient?

    The fact that you haven't offered a convincing argument that there are. By all means, go ahead and do that: what values, independent of the pursuit of life, are there, and why.
  10. Just a reminder of what's going on...or at least what you said is going on: you cut off contact with this person without an explanation. You might want to start the process of re-establishing contact with an explanation for your bizarre behavior, instead of any questions. I would suggest a well composed, written explanation. One in which you assume full responsibility for everything that happened, without being overly dramatic. Good luck: it's a big hole you dug yourself into.
  11. Nicky

    Why are men's clothing so boring?

    If anything, it should be the other way around: women should stop decorating themselves on a daily basis, too. I'm not opposed to the practice, for men or women, but it's a waste of time when done daily. There is no reason why women should only ever leave the house "decorated". And, indeed, women I know who are productive don't waste their time with that. My boss (a woman...she's also my favorite boss of all time) dresses in the same exact, simple clothes every day. She commands the respect and admiration of people around her through her actions, instead of her appearance (not that there's anything wrong with her appearance, it's just plain compared to how most women walk around). She does wear heels, a dress, makeup, etc. but only for special occasions, never for work or casual outings.
  12. Nicky

    Reblogged:Delimiting Required

    a one-day meeting ------------- An all day meeting? Dear sweet God. I hope the windows were locked, to keep people from jumping.
  13. These are usually three very different things: 1. the way person A is 2. the way person A sees him or her self 3. the way another person sees person A That's why it's very important to always be open to the possibility that you are wrong, about pretty much everything, except logically and scientifically proven truths. Odds are, she doesn't see herself as particularly witty or smart, or you as particularly dull or stupid. It's even possible that she isn't wittier or smarter than you, you just think so. As for the other three, you're probably right there, but those things don't really matter. Who cares who's stronger at work, has more sexual experience, or talks a lot? (women talk more than men, so they're better at it...whatever) It's silly to think any of that matters.
  14. Sorry, but this whole thing stopped making sense to me. On the one hand, you are describing a situation where a friend of yours, who you have a crush on, and who's shown interest in you herself, is either having a quick fling with someone else, or is in the early stages of a relationship with someone else. Either way, not a relationship that's guaranteed, or even likely, to last. On the other hand, you're talking about a girl who is "unattainable", "out of your league", and regret and missed opportunity, all suggesting that there's no chance you could ever date her. Those two stories can't both be true. It's one or the other. Which is it?
  15. I think you have a problem, but it's not what you think. Your problem isn't inexperience or shyness. Women don't mind that. What they mind is jealousy and insecurity. You are NOT in a relationship with anyone. You shouldn't act like you are, and while we're at it, you should also try not to feel like you are. Your jealousy is out of place. You're not in pain because of any kind of lost love (she's clearly not lost to you), you're in pain because of misplaced jealousy. Here are some things you shouldn't do: 1. Do not tell her about your jealousy or any kind of pain she is causing you. It's not her problem, not her responsibility to "not hurt you", etc. Don't even entertain the thought that it's her fault in any way, no matter how many texts she sends, and what's in them. It's her right to share her life with her friends, and it is not your right to blame her for it. It's also her right to test you, if that's what she was doing (though I doubt it), and see if you can handle the idea that she doesn't belong to you. If you ask her out, be casual about it, don't pressure her or become emotional. 2. Do not act on this pain in any way. Don't try to distract yourself with alcohol or any other high, substance induced or emotional, either. That's a way to validate it, too. You're in pain, just accept the fact and do nothing else, because it shouldn't be your goal to live a pailess life. 3. Do not for a second think that jealousy is an unavoidable part of love. It's not. It's a symptom of a sick culture that misrepresents love, not a natural consequence of human nature. If you never give an unwanted emotion any validation, and take full personal responsibility for having it (never blame anyone else for causing it), that is the way to fight it, and make it subside and eventually go away. And, in general, don't act like you're in a monogamous relationship, in any way. She clearly hasn't rejected you romantically (the way you, kinda annoyingly I must say, claimed in the OP), and there's no reason to give up on her, but you're not in any kind of relationship with her. So do what she does: keep your options open, go on dates with whoever will go out with you, be open about it with your friends, accept their support if offered, etc. Prove to yourself, and to everyone else, that you are able to keep your emotions grounded in reality: she's not the center of your existence in reality, therefor she shouldn't be the center of your emotional life, either. That groundedness will take you further with attractive, confident women (who have to deal with obsessive, possessive "admirers" on a regular basis) than anything else you can do.
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