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iflyboats last won the day on September 18 2011

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  1. In my case the girl did show interest at one point, but I think she’s since lost it and that I am now in the podcast person’s position. I don’t know how to approach finding out. My strategy was going to be to stay away from her for at least a few weeks before contacting her again (we’re now at one week with no contact). I also need to get my life together and get a job after being laid off. But once I’m able to do that, how would I approach her? “What happened before?” ”Are you still interested?” “Are you with anyone presently?”
  2. http://www.peikoff.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/2011-12-12.194_D.mp3 http://www.peikoff.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/2011-04-25.161_A.mpp3
  3. Not sure if this was the right decision, but today I asked her to remove me from the group text. Doing so will sever my main connection to her since she doesn’t talk to me 1-1 anymore. I hadn’t texted in there in a week, and people started asking where I was, so I had to take a stand. I lied every time I said I wanted to be friends.
  4. Would it be immoral to drive past her house to see if her car is there or if anyone elese’s is? She lives on s public road, so the act wouldn’t be illegal assuming I didn’t do it in a way that was harrassing, and it could provide valid clues about her relationship status; however, if she knew, she’d undoubtedly be creeped out, so I think it would be immoral.
  5. In my judgment, I’ve always felt like she should be out of my league. She’s smarter, wittier, much more experienced, a better conversationalist, and is stronger at work (we used to work together). I never understood why she liked me, but she actually did initiate everything and had to work on me for weeks to get me to go out with her. I was always way too timid around her, which I think is half the reason she lost interest. There was a clear offer of sex on the table a month ago, I didn’t have the balls to do anything, a week later she went cold on me, and since then I’ve acted like I’m okay with just being platonic friends. For the past few weeks she’s relegated me to being a member of her crew of former co-workers, whom she always hangs out with as a group which she leads. I can’t stand it. I have no interest in any of them except her. I still have no confirmation of anything but in the last week there’s been a change in her pattern consistent with her being with someone else after work on nights she doesn’t have her daughter. I believe she probably is, and yes it is very painful.
  6. I agree about not blaming her, but can you elaborate on how this jealousy is misplaced? It could have been me that she spent the weekend with but instead it was likely someone else over me because of some errors I made last month that caused her to lose interest. It was cool that this attractive, intelligent woman had been abstinent for over a year and at one point I was the one she wanted to end that with, but instead it ended up being someone else. Regret and missed opportunity. I've had a crush on her for months but let the opportunity slip. I am not saying any of it is her fault, but how are these feelings misplaced?
  7. Question along the same lines. Can a woman be attracted to/fall in love with an intellectually inferior man? Wasn’t Ayn Rand much more intellectually accomplished than Frank? How does that work if the woman is the stronger one?
  8. Last night my “friend” texted in our group text that she was considering a sexual encounter with someone else after some drinks. I don’t know whether she went through with it. I’ve don’t think I’ve ever felt pain like this, it’s the absolute worst feeling ever! A month ago we were going on dates and she was seriously talking about making me her conquest and ending her 14-month celibacy streak with me, then went cold on me the following week and has been treating me like a friend since. I've always been timid around her and stopped following up when she started showing that she was losing interest. Should I circle around one last time and ask her if she’s still interested? In case you can't tell, I have absolutely zero experience with women and she is the first person I've dated.
  9. I realize that intelligence is multifaceted, and that different individuals are good st different things, but some people clearly have talents far superior to those of others. Suppose the woman you want works on the same field and and rises faster and goes farther despite making less effort, and that she’s also wittier and a better conversationalist. She makes more, has more fiends, and attracts more interest from the opposite sex. Assuming you understand that these differences are genetic, would you be wrong to conclude that this woman is “out of your league?” Is it irrational to desire her in the first place?
  10. The woman you want having a superior mind.
  11. You don’t have infinite capacity for self-improvement. A woman could be out of your league for genetic reasons. But regardless, suppose the one you want is just not interested—should you try to stay friends?
  12. If you have a strong attraction to someone, should you accept a friendship if you believe she’s unattainable, and the only alternative is to delete her from your life? Does the strength of your feelings for her matter?
  13. iflyboats

    Should I abandon my stepdaughter?

    OK, I have to come clean. This scenario is fictitious. Although I do have a reason for wanting insightful responses, I shouldn't have pretended that this is a real situation.
  14. iflyboats

    Should I abandon my stepdaughter?

    I'm 30, my stepdaughter from my ex-marriage is 12, and I've been in her life for 11 years. She doesn't know her real father and considers me her dad. I divorced her mother a year ago, but I've stayed close to my stepdaughter, Skyping with her most days and seeing her usually at least a couple times a week. The divorce devastated her and I feel like sh*t about it, so I stayed on as her dad for HER sake to help get her through it. But for my own sake, I think I would benefit from breaking ties with my former family at this point. I don't want to deal with my ex at all, both her and I will date other people, and my stepdaughter will soon hit adolescence and put me through everything that that implies. It was fun when she was little, but I'm uncomfortable about the idea of being a parent to a teenage girl. Would it be evil of me to abandon her when I'm the only father figure she's ever known?
  15. Is it possible to identify it?