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The Selfish Path to Romance by Ellen Kenner&Edwin Locke

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The Selfish Path to Romance: How to Love with Passion and Reason by Dr. Edwin Locke and Dr. Ellen Kenner (Kindle Edition)

My quick review:

Throughout the 278 e-pages contained therein, this work demonstrates convincingly, no, more: undeniably, that the only true path to romance is a truly selfish one. Such a relationship put succinctly is: egoism à deux (egoism for two) and this entire book, unpacks that, I would say.

“One of the themes of this book is that selflessness destroys romantic love”

It sure does. Undeniably.

In this work, they give a brief history of love, they define what romantic love really is, it’s foundation upon moral character, treating each other as equals and as traders. With moral character and self-esteem you are thereby able to attract better partners than you would without it. Having certain moral qualities that will make you loveable, and another loveable to you when you see them also possessing such moral qualities. Well-matched couples are ones that share mutual core values and other shared value affinities, with mutual visibility, mutually beneficial exchanges between partners, a two way street for communication (both talking and listening), treating each other not only as a mind, but a whole person, a mind with a body.

“Romantic love is a strong, emotionally intimate relationship between consenting adults that combines an intense valuing of a partner on the deepest level and the enjoyment of sexual pleasure with that partner.”

The only path to such love, is a rationally selfish one, the only one leading to romantic happiness and longevity in a relationship. This book is a case in point.

They provide examples from their own clinical experience, or ones that they have read in regards to peoples relationships found in the media, etc. in order to pinpoint why the particular relationship is as unhappy or as happy as it is, the psychology and philosophy at the very foundation of both.

I recommend it not only to singles but also to couples.

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