How do we master Self-Control?

[Anuj]

Sometimes people just don’t know how to differentiate right and wrong. But yet even when most people are able to differentiate, they are unable to restrain themselves from whatever that is wrong. This gives way to the thinking that 'Perfect Man' does not exists; the thinking that there is always a middle ground between the good and bad; the thinking that things are neither black nor white but 'shades of gray'. 
 
Before talking about Self-control, it is necessary to discuss about 'Pleasure'. Pleasure, Joy and Happiness are emotions that are important to achieve a sense of ‘Life’; a sense of Self-Esteem; a feeling that life is worth living. Pleasure/Happiness is attained from Productive work, Human Relationship, Sex, Recreation and Art. Except for Productive work none of the other activities necessarily provide long term happiness. A bully of a friend, smoking, irrational lust though are perfectly capable of providing pleasure, yet are counter-intuitive to the idea of long term happiness. In contrast a knowledgeable friend, a good book, swimming and Romantic Love with an Ideal Partner can make life Enriching. 
 
But then how does one escape from the clutches of irrational pleasures?

1. Philosophy - Man is inescapable of Philosophy. Every action a man chooses has philosophical roots. It's his choice to identify it or not. It’s irrelevant of the fact that man studies philosophy or not.  Man can choose to act based on feelings, emotions, faith, or whims (Subjectivism) or based on ‘Reason’ towards a specific purpose and specific objective (Objectivism). Philosophy is a guide to Man's Life. Therefore It’s essential to study, identify and choose a Perfect Philosophy that clearly differentiates black and , good from bad, rational from irrational, moral from the immoral based on a Standard; That differentiates what should be restrained and ignored from that which should be cultivated.
2. Judgment – Values are anything that one wants to ‘gain’ or ‘keep’. Emotions by itself are not bad or good. Emotions are lighting fast calculators of a moment or situation. Emotions are the automatic results of what man holds as a ‘Value’. Observe that when two people who are asked to watch pornography, each can exhibit different emotions. One can lustfully enjoy it yet the other can feel disgusted. Different emotions (Joy, Disgust) are exhibited due to the fact that one holds pornography as a 'Value', while the other does not. The latter is aware of its crude vulgarity and its objectification of women. The former is either not or is not 'one with himself'. That’s why judgment of value is important. Is smoking or over-indulgent eating and drinking healthy? Is company of a bully to be valued and sustained?  Is gambling good ? Is spending too much time on internet irrational? Think and Judge before holding anything as value. Do not hold or do anything arbitrarily or just because other people do. Think and Judge!
3. The Animal - We've evolved from animals. There is a little bit of animal still left in us. The Rational part of our brain is pretty new compared to emotional pleasure driven part. Rational and structured thoughts are often an effort and tires us quickly compared to emotional and arbitrary thoughts, which can run all day long. When asked not to think about elephant. The word elephant itself triggers the elephant Imagery. An act of controlling thought or monitoring absence of a thought itself induces the thought. It then becomes necessary neither to think nor to monitor that which should be controlled. 'Distraction' is perhaps the best way to tame this animal. When you think of smoking try to end up eating a chocolate or having tea instead.  -- Marshmallow Experiment conducted on kids has shown that kids who were able to successfully control themselves from the immediate pleasure of the moment had a greater re-warding Life in the future. 
4. Purpose - Choose a purpose. A productive work. “Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.” But even If you don't find a job that you love, it is necessary that you do get a work, in order to live self-dependently and survive. Grow pride. Get an ego. Love yourself. A passionate purpose driven man has hardly time to indulge in irrational desires. 

P.S. :
The post is mostly influenced from the works of Ayn Rand, especially from the essays found in the book "The Virtue of Selfishness". 
 
Link to the original

Edited February 14, 2015 by Anuj

[Anuj]

I had posted this on my blog especially for Non-Objectivist readers. Please feel free to criticize or point out if there are further more points that can be addressed. Thanks.

[Harrison Danneskjold]

Rational and structured thoughts are often an effort and tires us quickly compared to emotional and arbitrary thoughts, which can run all day long.

This is usually the product of bad mental habits, though, which can be deliberately changed. If you frequently indulge your whims, for example, without analyzing or evaluating why you feel them, later on you will find it difficult to do otherwise- until you form a different mental habit. Interestingly, from a neurological standpoint, making and breaking such habits actually alters the structure of your brain's pathways, which changes its function in scientifically measurable ways. That ties nicely into point #4, to which I would only add:

"If you know what's right then you want to do it. If you don't want to do it then you don't know that it's right. If you know what's right, but don't want to do it, then you don't know what 'right' is and you're not a man." -Ayn Rand

That way of looking at it is another thing which can be mentally automated.

[Spiral Architect]

This is usually the product of bad mental habits, though, which can be deliberately changed. If you frequently indulge your whims, for example, without analyzing or evaluating why you feel them, later on you will find it difficult to do otherwise- until you form a different mental habit. Interestingly, from a neurological standpoint, making and breaking such habits actually alters the structure of your brain's pathways, which changes its function in scientifically measurable ways. That ties nicely into point #4, to which I would only add:

"If you know what's right then you want to do it. If you don't want to do it then you don't know that it's right. If you know what's right, but don't want to do it, then you don't know what 'right' is and you're not a man." -Ayn Rand

That way of looking at it is another thing which can be mentally automated.

 

I second this - I have watched my own method of thinking improve from effort to practically automated after years of correcting bad habits in thinking.  Now I see those habits in others and I'm amazed at how they go out of there way mentally.  

[m082844]

I had posted this on my blog especially for Non-Objectivist readers. Please feel free to criticize or point out if there are further more points that can be addressed. Thanks.

When do you address "how do we master self-control?"? I was looking for that.