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So within the last month or two, I have decided that I want to be an engineer, and that I will wait until grad school for it and in the meantime finish my computer science degree and do a physics major as well. I have been working pretty much nonstop for the last few weeks on various assignments/project/studying for tests, but it hasn't really worn me out and I know I could handle it for the next few years, which I just might have to anyway.

But what bothers me is that I feel a lack of motivation. Other than the fact that I have set the goals, there is not much that is really keeping me motivated on a day to day basis. In Atlas Shrugged (which I am still reading), so many of the characters are full of life and invigorated, not willing to waste a second on anything or anyone that would take time away from what they want to do. I know that this is only a book and can only reflect reality to a limited extent, but I generally live with a strong sense of what I should and would like to be like, and usually when I can, I move in that direction. Motivation, however, is not an easy thing to summon and it is not as easy as following a certain procedure to achieve a goal.

For the last few years I have become more driven, but not significantly, and what has really changed has been my goals. I have been telling myself that it is a long term process, that I just need to give it time, and that eventually my logic will seep into my own nature and I will be more driven than anyone I know, but I have given it quite a bit of time and I still often feel like it wouldn't matter if I just stopped what I am doing, that I wouldn't be any happier pushing myself to the limit than I would if I took things at an easy pace. I can rationalize everything, but it's one thing when logic has to take precedence over impulsivity in an event where obeying emotion could result in worse emotion, such as denying the convenience of driving drunk and ending up on a stretcher or worse, but when the ends to my effort aren't what I had hoped for... it seems like a bit of a problem.

For the novelty of it I took an unusual online personality test based on colors (http://www.colorquiz.com/), and the results told me that I am egocentric and basically sensitive to what other people think. The truth to that is irrelevant, but it got me thinking and I have kind of concluded that I am insecure, not in the sense that I care about what other people think of me, I really don't (although I used to quite severely), but that I don't feel like I am living up to my own standards; I have always been a bit of a perfectionist on occasion, in fact I would sometimes throw fits as a child if I made an irreversible error on school work such as coloring out of the lines. I think I might be holding myself to unrealistic standards, but I can't just let myself give up. Academically, I have pretty much pushed myself to the limit as far as what my course load is, it would be very hard for me to find a harder schedule. I don't know if I am going to be able to handle it. I do know that I will work until I shut down if that is what it takes. But I just want to enjoy it more... what does that take?

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First off Tnunamak, I admire your hard work and your striving for accomplishment. I would argue that motivation is a very fluid concept because it is so dependent on our emotions and passions. So it is a constant seesaw effect of ups and downs because that's just how emotions are. What I found that helped me in this issue is at first recognizing that my moto will have its highs and lows. This will allow you to take charge and combat the lows when you realize you are in them. I would like to ask if the various assignments/project/studying for test also allows time for other activities of interest. A technique I use is using one of my other passions, be it recreational or professional, to kind of stir up my emotions and feelings of accomplishment and confidence. To help me remember how good winning feels and how much I enjoy taking on challenges, realizing I am greater than these challenges and rising to the occasion. This gives me what I would call a momentum, and then I return to the area I was burnt out in and dominate. Another technique I find helpful is putting motivation in its proper place. I remember reading a quote saying "motivation gets you started but habit keeps you going". This reminds me that heart will only take you so far but to be truly successful you have to use all sort of techniques, strategies and skills. When we see this we become invincible.

Hope I have been of some help.

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I have been working pretty much nonstop for the last few weeks on various assignments/project/studying for tests, but it hasn't really worn me out and I know I could handle it for the next few years, which I just might have to anyway.

But what bothers me is that I feel a lack of motivation. Other than the fact that I have set the goals, there is not much that is really keeping me motivated on a day to day basis.

[bold added for emphasis.]

Tnunamak, do you see a contradiction in the boldface text?

Have you closely studied Dr. Edwin Locke's Study Methods and Motivation (available from the Ayn Rand Bookstore)? It has been one of the 20 most important books in my life.

Lastly, in The Fountainhead and in Atlas Shurgged did you notice that the main characters highly value leisure time? Examples are Roark swimming, Francisco and Dagny playing tennis, and others walking. What role do you think leisure should play in the life of a rational person?

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[bold added for emphasis.]

Tnunamak, do you see a contradiction in the boldface text?

Have you closely studied Dr. Edwin Locke's Study Methods and Motivation (available from the Ayn Rand Bookstore)? It has been one of the 20 most important books in my life.

Lastly, in The Fountainhead and in Atlas Shurgged did you notice that the main characters highly value leisure time? Examples are Roark swimming, Francisco and Dagny playing tennis, and others walking. What role do you think leisure should play in the life of a rational person?

I don't specifically see a contradiction, but I do know that last year I had much more leisure time and I don't know that I would say that I feel like I enjoyed last year any more than I do this year. I have had very rare moments working on a project where just the idea of what I am doing and am able to accomplish is enough to inspire me to achieve much greater things, or times when I have taken ideas from lectures and marveled at the ideas throughout the day, so I know what it is that I want to experience. I don't think that it has much to do with picking the right field, I have taken classes on a variety of topics (I'm at a liberal arts school) and none of them have interested me as much as computer science, physics (somewhat), and engineering do.

I will definitely look into the book you have suggested, although it will probably be quite a while before I get to it. It has taken me about 3 months to get through 3/4 of Atlas Shrugged, and I try to read when I have free time; most of my reading is usually textbooks.

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So within the last month or two, I have decided that I want to be an engineer, and that I will wait until grad school for it and in the meantime finish my computer science degree and do a physics major as well. I have been working pretty much nonstop for the last few weeks on various assignments/project/studying for tests, but it hasn't really worn me out and I know I could handle it for the next few years, which I just might have to anyway.

... Academically, I have pretty much pushed myself to the limit as far as what my course load is, it would be very hard for me to find a harder schedule. I don't know if I am going to be able to handle it. I do know that I will work until I shut down if that is what it takes. But I just want to enjoy it more... what does that take?

What type of projects have you been working on? The reason I ask is, if all you do is take classes that require nothing more than homework and exams, you will lose motivation.

If by project, you mean long, extended homework assignments, then it probably won't do much. What you need are projects that engage your mind more. After 4 years of doing nothing but learning theory, I'm pretty tired of it. I have two types of projects in mind that can help generate motivation.

The first type is research. After learning knowledge created by others, it’s only natural to take the next step and start creating your own knowledge. The challenge of facing reality as a pioneer is very different from just absorbing the results of other people's work.

The second type is clubs/jobs, ideally related to your studies. Not only do you learn how to apply the theory, you learn other skills like leadership/teamwork etc.

My point is that you don't need a harder schedule, you need a schedule with a variety of challenges. I suspect that your day to day schedule consists of sitting at a desk for hours on end, which, although sometimes necessary, can drain your motivation pretty fast.

Edited by xavier
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The first type is research. After learning knowledge created by others, it’s only natural to take the next step and start creating your own knowledge. The challenge of facing reality as a pioneer is very different from just absorbing the results of other people's work.

Research would be great. The problem would just be where to start. I had an opportunity to do research in AI last year with an excellent professor, which would have been great if that were my field of interest, but it wasn't so I turned it down. Other than that I don't know of any opportunities, but thanks for bringing it up, I will find out more about it.

The second type is clubs/jobs, ideally related to your studies. Not only do you learn how to apply the theory, you learn other skills like leadership/teamwork etc.

We do have a programming club, I just never joined it because of my heavy schedule. I do wonder if I could join on a non-commited, "come if I have time" basis. I'll have to look into that as well. The only thing is, I do a lot of "write a program that will do this" kind of assignments, where I am using what we learn in class to solve a problem. Depending on what it is, sometimes I really enjoy the assignments, but I do think I have quite enough of them already. Research seems to be what would bring something new to the table.

My point is that you don't need a harder schedule, you need a schedule with a variety of challenges. I suspect that your day to day schedule consists of sitting at a desk for hours on end, which, although sometimes necessary, can drain your motivation pretty fast.

I think you hit the nail on the head. My day to day schedule really does consist of sitting at a desk during lectures in class, coming home, and then setting at my desk for many hours doing homework. I thought about it a little, and I think another problem is that physics I am doing is really just preliminary to what I want to do with engineering, and I'm not doing much of the kind of work I want to do in computer science right now. I guess everyone has their ups and downs, and I must be in a down, I just hope it won't stay that way for too long. Thanks for the help guys.

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