jennipher

I'm having a really hard time coming up with anything to put on a cover letter. " To Whom It May Concern: I am applying for the Temporary File Clerk position advertised on craigslist. I’m seeking a temporary entry-level position that I can do while waiting to resume school later this year. I’ve carefully reviewed the job description, and I’m confident in my ability to competently perform all of the tasks stated therein Attached is a brief resume for you to review. While I understand that my limited work experience is a strike against me, my awareness of this deficiency is motivation to prove my worth and ability. I want to show you that I am punctual, dependable, honest, affable and capable. I would love to tell your more about myself and how I can be an asset to your company. Please contact me at your convenience if this would be a possibility." That's all I really have to say about myself, and if I read that I would throw it in the trash.

I've been in pretty bad shape because my job prospects seem so abysmally bad that I just collapse in disgust every time I pull up Craigslist. I've been reading about the economic boom in ND and all the jobs that have grown up around the energy industry there; do you think it would be crazy or unnecessarily drastic to relocate in the hope of overcoming my barriers to employment? It's not my kind if place but at least it has a real economy.

There are no jobs for which I am qualified as far as I know. My prospects seem nonexistent. School? It just seems insurmountable....first, knowing what field, then actually finishing, then actually landing a job... it seems like an impossibly far away target to hit. Careers... as a result of years of inactivity and near complete value starvation, I've lost all contact with interests... the only things that I know interest me are ideas (Objectivism and Capitalism) and finance (investing). I admire tech products a great deal, but don't see myself as a software engineer... the shale revolution is awesome, but I don't know how to do anything related to that. I have some vague impression that teaching would be cool, but I could be wrong.

parents + disability...it has been my ambition to get off disability ever since I went on it, but I haven't been able to make it happen, despite having previously attempted both of the options I stated

Here's what I'm up against: 1. I have a serious health problem, rheumatoid arthritis, which although not disabling, prohibits me from performing most unskilled jobs, and all jobs that require prolonged standing or repetitive motion. I am not comfortable working in the kinds of jobs that remain open to me, i.e. clerical, secretarial or call center work. 2. At 25, I have no recent work experience or accomplishments, which probably sends up a HUGE red flag to employers that something is seriously wrong with me, which is true. 3. I have no skills, experience or useful education (just a useless Associate's degree) and a bad year of University. 4. I have no references. 5. The country is in an economic depression and the job market is cutthroat. At almost any job that I apply to, there are likely to be candidates far more qualified than me. My options are: 1. Initiate a job hunt with incredibly bleak prospects, apply for jobs I don't want and falsely try to sell myself as the best candidate knowing that the odds of success are close to zero. Last time I attempted this I broke down in despair. 2. Go to school. But there is nothing that I want to go to school for and I can't stand the time commitment. I have bern pondering this for months and can't will myself to do either.

The first thing at which I need to succeed is attaining suitable employment of any kind. The second thing is finding a career, something I can do long-term. The impediments to both seem almost insurmountable. After that, I can start thinking about relationships.

First, I apologize for the dark post. I am not posting this in any way to garner sympathy, but only to promote my quest for clarity. I am a 25 year old female. Due to a combination of adverse circumstances outside of my control, and my own failure to better cope with those circumstances, my life has degenerated to the point of being an ugly train wreck. I am suffering due to both a total lack of essential values and the presence of major negatives. I have strong doubts about whether it's possible to attain essential values like meaningful or even appropriate work and love. If I don't take decisive action soon, I am certain to face real hardship in the near future. It may be the case that any action will be futile and I'll end up facing hardship anyway. It isn't certain that all is lost yet. There are certain courses of action still open to me. However, I am averse to them, because 1) the chances of success, although unknown, seem poor; 2) from my current perspective, the destinations to which they lead do not seem like values anyway, i.e. it seems that, at best, they would lead to mere survival, but not success or happiness, and at worst, they are outright objectionable; and 3) the road ahead is paved with all kinds of dangers and evils. I am unsure whether these premises are correct, but that is how things look to me. Another factor complicating things is that I feel great uncertainty as to what course of action to take. There are many issues and sub-issues to consider in charting a course, and it’s too much for me to handle mentally. I'm just not strong enough to know what to do. I wish I was, but I am no Dagny. Because of the bleak outlook, I'm straddling the fence on whether I wish to continue living, and leaning toward calling it quits. Even though I am not necessarily helpless, I feel that I have lost control of my destiny and that my ability to achieve happiness has been compromised to a degree that I don't want to accept. In the last few months, I have been unable to work up the will to take any action to help myself, even where there is everything to gain and nothing to lose, and on a daily basis I lapse in and out of wanting to make a try for it and wanting to end it depending on what thought I happen to be aware of at the moment. Rather than trying to move forward, I seem to be trying to convince myself that suicide is justified. With each day that passes, I am slowly letting go of the opportunities for action that remain. I don't want to throw my life away unnecessarily out of cowardice, for irrational reasons, because my judgement is clouded or due to some character flaw that I'm unaware of. However, in my current mental state, even though some action is possible, I cannot see any opportunity for success and happiness, and therefore it "feels" like no worthwhile action is possible. I look at all of my options, and when my subconscious is done adding everything up, the resulting emotions are disgust, anxiety and fear, and I can’t act. I just hate the circumstances too much to deal with them. The only thing that keeps me going is that maybe there is some chance of success that I just can’t see right now. Maybe I’m just so depressed that I’m unable to see the opportunities that may exist outside of my sphere of awareness. Maybe if I try something that I don’t want to try, even if I don’t think it will work, I’ll be pleasantly surprised and it will. Maybe my premises are wrong and my estimation of the situation is based on irrational emotions instead of facts. My options are: 1) die, 2) take aggressive action to try to help myself and 3) to remain idle and do nothing as my life slips away. #3 is not acceptable. Any advice?