BlackInMind

Dennis, that is an amazingly empowering statement, thank you!

Hello! I browsed around and didn't see a topic on this issue so I figured I'd start one. I just started a relationship that I'm very happy with so far. However, as with past relationships as well, I get some severe bouts of anxiety over it. It only happens in between spending time with her. We live pretty far from each other and have very busy schedules, so we can only see each other once a week. In between times, my mind goes to worse case scenarios that this is "too good to be true" sort of thinking. She's the type that prefers to communicate via text message, so I wind up over analyzing and picking apart all of her texts and how she responds. I also over analyze my actions, wondering if something is say or do is off putting. Often I see similarities between her and past failed girlfriends and I start thinking along the lines of "oh maybe she's going to turn out just like *that* one." However, when we are together in person everything is fine and I can be my normal confident self around her. I know this kind of anxiety is all based in irrational thinking but for some reason no matter how much I tell myself this, my mind can't stop going there. I have to fix this otherwise I feel like I'm going to either drive myself crazy or create a self fulfilling prophecy with this relationship or any future ones. Help!

I am.

@Superman123 You're welcome :-). It's definitely one of my favorite films. I think the big giveaways to me that the characters in the film are complete second handers are the moments where Bateman mentions things such as "Because I want to fit in" or the fact that he is able to avoid being caught as a killer due to everyone constantly mistaking everyone else for each other. Its really clear the reason the characters are so obsessed with their looks, wealth, etc. is to impress others. Also I'm a huge Peter Gabriel-era Genesis fan, and that whole scene where he analyses 80's Genesis cracks me up. "Before Phil Collins took over, they were too artsy for me"

Off topic, but if you think the characters in American Psycho are just "successful people looking after themselves" I think you missed the point of the movie. I've never seen a more perfect portrayal of Peter Keatings.

Judging by some of the trailers, it looks like they're sanctioning the typical conservative ideas that Fox already promotes. I'll reserve full judgement for the time being (its possible they will give time to all sides of the right and are just leaning on the republican conservatives right now to generate mainstream interest) but for now I remain skeptical that this is going to give any voice to anything close to reason.

I found the video hilarious, but for the sheer ridiculousness of how stupid it and the lyrics are. They are completely promoting their Christian faith with it. The song clearly represents choosing to be ignorant. It's basically saying "lets not try to discover how things work or anything about our world/universe and instead just stand back and say "its a FUCKIN MIRACLE, YO." The line about scientists should state that pretty clearly. It's completely the opposite of what an Objectivist believes, but like I said, I found value in making fun of it.

I dated a girl once that considered herself an existentialist. She particularly liked Sarte. I never did wind up reading any actual books on the subject, but from what she said about it, its got a real negative view of life. That life is unasked for and terrible, but oh well, I'm here and might as well keep living. Another thing I remember her saying is that Sarte claimed people could never be truly free, since there are consequences to every situation that prevents people from doing what they "really want." I don't think I need to explain why thats stupid. Anyway, I lent her the Virtue of Selfishness and she called Rand "stupid and full of contradictions" (was she reading the right book?). You can guess how long this relationship lasted after that . On the other hand I do know Nietzsche is considered an existentialist and that there are a decent amount of similarities between what he had to say and Objectivism (I believe Rand was influenced by him at one point).

I know its not that my music has changed (in an overall context aside from natural progressions I've made as a musician), he's simply become more critical. I asked him not too long ago if he thought the material I had written on the last album was better (after he had been criticizing my new stuff more) and he basically told me he still didn't like most of it, and he was now saying what he felt about the actual songwriting more than before. You are right that I know he is just trying to help me and bring the best out of me, but in the process it definitely has screwed up my ability to judge my own work. A few times in the past its driven me to totally resist him, but when I do, he takes offense, telling me I need to be less stubborn. I have read The Fountainhead, which is why I know there is a problem here to begin with. This also made me think had Rand ever said anything about editors of her novels, since editors are essentially performing the same role as a producer in music?

I'm not sure if this is the best forum to post this in, but since it deals with a specifc person I figured it was. I write my own original music and have two albums under my belt already. For both of these albums a friend of mine helped me to produce them. For those that might be unfamiliar with the role of a producer in the rock/metal world, they are there to provide an outside set of ears to capture the best performance from the artist, oversee the sonic end of things (how the mix sounds etc) and sometimes having a say in the songwriting. For a while I felt like I was working very well with him. I trust his judgement on how things sound, and he overall did a good job for what I paid him for. However, now that I have been writing new music and showing it to him, he has been rejecting a lot of ideas that I have been happy with. This wouldn't be so much of a problem if it wasn't for the fact that I do trust his ears and he gives good reasons when he doesn't like something. Thing is though, that it's gotten to the point where I'm trusting his judgement over my own. I'm constantly writing with the question in the back of my mind if he is going to approve or not. And when he does give his opinion, I'm left wondering if I'm agreeing with him because he is right or because he makes me feel like my judgement is inferior to his, so I go along and agree with him I know there have been instances where I went with a suggestion of his and from an objective viewpoint it was better than what I orignally had, but I feel like the confidence I once had in my songwriting ability is shot. The guy has been a friend of mine for a long time and like I said, there are instances where his outside ear is useful, I'm just at a loss for how to regain the confidence in my writing when I may present him an idea I'm proud of and he tells me "absolutely not."

Define recreational drug use. What about smokers or social drinkers? Caffeine is a drug that alters someone's perception as well (albeit providing them with more focus). Plenty of the main characters in Rand's novels enjoyed these 3 things. I suppose at the time Rand was writing the ill effects of smoking on someone's health weren't as documented as they are today, however, we're not talking about health effects. We're talking about an altered sensory perception due to recreational drugs. I'm just curious where you're drawing the line between substances, or their usage. A drug is a drug. Please let me know what the difference is between having a buzz at a social gathering via alcohol and having one via marijuana.

I was at the closest tea party to me today (Morristown, NJ) and to be honest, I was disappointed. I guess these are supposed to be non-partisan but they had a bunch of Republicans looking to run for Governor in the next elections speaking, and the whole thing just stunk of GOP. The worst thing I heard said was "The government needs to stop telling us how to be our brother's keepers, we can do that ourselves" It made me seriously start thinking about seeing if I could speak at the next one on July 4th, just so I could provide a voice for reason.

I liked the first section of the first Zeitgeist movie and then it turned into a silly conspiracy theory movie. And then the Venus Project is as Clockwork stated...

Given how Rand describes the main characters in her novels, I'd think it would be obvious she found high value in beauty.

I'm a huge metalhead. Lately I've been revisiting a lot of classic 80s stuff like Megadeth, Overkill, and King Diamond/Mercyful Fate. My current favorite band is Nevermore, although Symphony X is the band that probably had the biggest impact on me. Thanks to my dad, I grew up listening to 70s prog rock, and as far as that goes my favorites would be Genesis (Gabriel era only), King Crimson, and Rush (been listening to a lot of them lately as well). I like *some* 80s goth, for example Bauhaus and The Sisters of Mercy. I really enjoy fusion guitarists like Allan Holdsworth and Shawn Lane, although I think it'd be inaccurate to say I was an out and out jazz fan because of that, cause I'm not much into a lot of the straight bebop stuff. And thanks to having had my "neoclassical/Shrapnel Records/Yngwie" phase I was sought out a lot of great classical stuff too. The composers I discovered that I liked the most were Mozart, Bartok, Satie, and Bach, and I really love Vivaldi's 4 Seasons too (not familiar with much of his other work tho).