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DrawingCircles

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  1. We were talking about how to get over the fear of public speaking in my speech class and one of the other students thought that it would be best to just not care what other people think. Of course that wouldn't be practical in a persuasive speech among a variety of other settings, so I thought that maybe it's only irrational to care about what people think of you personally. What do you guys think? Or is it only irrational when you let the fear of their judgment affect your actions/life/public speaking? And what if they weren't strangers? What if you wanted to be friends with them eventually, do you have to care what they think of you personally? I don't think so. My thoughts were that your opinion of yourself is more important than what other people think of you. So it doesn't matter what people think/say about you because your opinion of yourself supersedes theirs, despite who they might be: friends, family, strangers. For example, you might think/say I'm strange/weird but I don't consider myself as that so my opinion of myself doesn't change despite what you might think about me. Is this in accordance with Objectivist philosophy?
  2. Thanks Zip, DavidOdden, and Tyco. You guys have been extremely helpful. I have a new question now if you guys don't mind, 9.) What is pity? Feeling sorry for someone? What does that mean? What is self pity? Why is it considered bad? Is it only considered bad when people treat it like its some type of noble trait?
  3. Thanks for the quick replies everyone. I'm really grateful for all the advice and opinions regarding my questions. Everything is becoming clearer! @Steve D'Ippolito' Thanks for your response Steve. Why don't you consider it a problem to find someone better than you? Does that mean that better people are just there to gauge where your weaknesses are? It doesn't do anything to your self esteem? Incidentally, is your self esteem boosted by all the people that you're good against? Yeah I didn't know what OPAR meant, but thanks for clarifying that. Yes, I have read Atlas Shrugged and I'm planning to reread it again. You're speaking of the part where Francisco and Rearden talk about what it means to be a playboy correct? I believe they were saying that love is an expression of the highest values that you admire. But I don't remember them talking about lust. I'm confused about this love/lust relationship because I'm trying to figure out why I lust after people and yet not love them. @Zip Thanks again for your response Zip. I see, so you compare your performance now with your previous performance to look for improvement. So are you saying that doing your best would be enough to not care whether you win or lose or whether they're better than you? And would that mean, like the question I posed to Steve, better people only serve as a test to see where your weaknesses are? Exceptions in how you treat them or think about them. What is a value judgment? Something that you've judged valuable? I didn't understand what you meant by "If they say something hurtful what is the question you think I should ask first?" Thanks for clarifying the importance of knowing what lust is built upon. What is a second-handed assessment of others? I think I've been after sluttiness all my life. Do you know how to stop lust when it's not a component of love but rather a whimsical and superficial desire? @DavidOdden Thanks for your response once again DavidOdden. So to be rational is to be realistic and I have to set rational goals that are reflective of reality. So an example is that I don't want to work and still expect to be a millionaire would be the mindset that I have now. In order for me to make the goal of becoming a millionaire a reality, I would have to set goals that are realistic and tangible along the way to becoming a millionaire. These goals have to be rational and reflective of reality. And you were saying that it's okay to take little detours such as working at McDonalds in order to be practical while still staying in accordance with my long term goal. I think I understand, thanks! Why can't being happy be my purpose in life? In John Galt's speech about Reason, Purpose, and Self Esteem, I thought the part about Purpose was the "choice of happiness." Wouldn't that make being happy through my choice of happiness my primary goal in life? Why would there be serious survival consequences in creating an absolutely perfect product? If I'm correct in assuming you are a teacher, does that mean you are talking about creating a perfect student? So you suggest having a concrete vision of the order in which your values stand and check to see if they are practical and realistic? It's reassuring to know that getting an A is not a "rational skill that I need to cultivate." You said grades should just reflect your performance at rational tasks. Rational tasks are rational because they are reflective of what reality has required of me? And would you say then that it doesn't make sense for me to compare myself with others at all because we all have different goals? @Tyco Thanks for your response Tyco. Did you mean to say that he didn't care what they thought if he knew they were wrong? And Wow, this was the answer I was looking for - that he had firm convictions so it didn't matter what other people said. Thanks! I have a question though, how do you feel sure that you aren't acting on any contradictory premises? If everything you believe rings true with you? Because don't you have to include others in seeing whether your premises are contradictory? And thanks for your advice on employment. I'll be sure to keep that in mind the next time I find that my boss doesn't respect my values. And I didn't know that part about the long-term contradiction. I see. The part about where your self esteem comes from was very insightful. Is it bad to have achievement be your only/main source of self esteem? I think that's kind of the whole tenet of objectivism but what happens when you you're unable to achieve something? Like for example your handicapped and you can't walk, although you would very much like to. Would you just find different goals to achieve? What do you mean by Roark not catering to their need? You mean their need of attention or his approval? And about lust, I think I've been doing just that -admiring someone only physically. Do you know of any ways to stop? I know there's a whole section on Atlas Shrugged about how the mind and body shouldn't ever have contradictory feelings but how do you resolve the conflict? I have a question for you Tyco, how do you view other people? Especially strangers whom you've never met? For example, do you view them as potential friends, strangers, brothers? You've resolved a lot of the inner turmoil I've felt because I thought I was contradicting myself. Thanks once again. @Alfa Thanks for your response Alfa. I agree that when you think of lust as an intense desire, it seems like an appropriate response to someone you love. But what does it mean to love someone then? And how come you can lust after someone you don't love?
  4. Wow, 80 something views but only 2 responses? Nobody else has any opinions on these issues? Thank you DavidOdden and Zip for responding so quickly. I have one more question. 8) What does it mean to be physically attracted to someone? Is it a reflection of what you see in yourself? And how does lust vs love fit into this? @DavidOdden Thanks for your response. From what I understand of your post, since I want something from my employer (money), I should fulfill my end of the bargain to the best of my ability (my work performance) and I shouldn't care what they feel about me, but rather what they feel about my work performance. I see what you mean. Thanks for clarifying that relationship for me. You said that I would have to recognize that I have an unrealistic plan of life, does that mean that I would have to compromise or conform to the situation? In fixing the contradiction, I would either have to give up on making those nice shoes or find another job correct? I'm interested in what your answer to the other questions would be. @Zip Thanks for your response. You said you liked competition, but how do you feel when you lose? Especially if it's something you felt that you're good at? And do you make any exceptions for your friends? Where do you draw the line between you and them? What happens when they say something hurtful? Do you know where I could get more information on "first handedness"? I've only heard of "second handedness" through Roark. Thank you for your advice. I knew I was conflicted about trying to live up to Roark but it's good to know that I don't have to be exactly like him. Your post about discovering who I am as opposed to simply following who Roark is rings well with me. Thanks! And if you can, can you answer question 8 as well?
  5. Hello, I don't know if this is the right section to be posting in, but I have quite a few questions on Objectivism's application in daily life (if these are Objectivist principles). A little bit about my background: I'm currently a student and I was first introduced to Ayn Rand when I was thinking about writing for the scholarship essay on Atlas Shrugged. I haven't done it yet, but after reading Atlas Shrugged I feel that it is among the best if not the best book I've ever read. I couldn't stop reading her books and I've just finished The Fountainhead (and you'll see that most of my questions are based on that) and now I'm starting to read We the Living. What drew me to these books were the characteristics and the philosophy that all the heroic characters exhibited. I liked many of the ideas, particularly the "place nothing over the verdict of your own mind", the use of reason as the only tool of knowledge, and the idea of you being as good as you think you are. It might be a bit juvenile but I want to become like the characters in the book, or at least acquire some of the characteristics that make them so great in my eyes. The problem with that is that sometimes I find the application to be a bit difficult or it results in a little inner turmoil and so that's where these questions come from. Main Question 1-2 1.) What I've concluded from Roark is that he doesn't care what others think about him or his work. He doesn't care if other people agree with him or not. And so I've tried to apply this thinking to my own life but it doesn't seem too practical. For example, what happens with employment. Don't you have to care what your bosses think about you and your work? What kind of relationship do you have with your employer if he's the boss and the one in control of your salary? And do you have any tips for not caring about what other people think. I've had an inferiority complex and I've been pretty self conscious all my life so I'm trying to think of ways to develop a "tough shell" so to speak. I'd like to be like Roark, where the pain only goes so far and then he's impervious to it. Any suggestions? 2.) This might be linked to the first question, but how is it possible to not compare and contrast in everyday life? Roark said he was too conceited to make comparisons or consider himself in relation to anyone else. This is what I've found to be the hardest to do. What does it mean to not see myself in relation to anyone? Do you have any suggestions on how to stop? Then what about competition? When you compete in sports or grades, aren't you comparing yourself or your skills against someone else? Or if you're working for someone, aren't you making comparisons to your rival? And if self esteem shouldn't come from comparisons, what is that feeling that you get when you've beat someone in a tennis match? Side Questions 3-7 3.) Is it possible for you to define what a friend is. And with respect to that, what would your family mean to you? 4.) Is it wrong to be well liked or popular? Or is it just wrong to seek it? From what I've read, in order to reach that state, you have to make compromises, but from what I've felt I don't feel like compromises have been made. And I know it's wrong to seek other people's approvals, but does that mean it's not good to feel accepted or wanted? 5.) I know Roark says the meaning of life is your work but have you guys found something else besides your work? I think that the meaning of life through work applies to Roark because work is his choice of happiness. What is your choice of happiness? 6.) What does it mean to not be conscious of anyone? Throughout the story Rand stresses the idea that Roark doesn't seem conscious of anyone and I think that consequently makes the person on the receiving end to feel nonexistent. He knows that there's someone there, but how can he not be conscious of that person if he turns and talks to that person? 7.) Finally, wouldn't you feel sort of...lonely? Especially Roark. With all this not caring and not being conscious of other people doesn't that make for a very lonely existence? Before you post: I'm well aware that all of these questions have underlying themes and could probably be answered with a broad and general statement but if you could, please take the time to acknowledge and address each of the scenarios or situations because these are the very scenarios that have been bothering me. In addition, I know that each question has a succession of questions within it. They aren't used to prove a point; they're a series of questions because I really don't understand the answer to them. And if you could, please continuously check back on this thread. I'd like to have a discussion and sometimes I might need a clarification. Other than that, I eagerly await your replies. Henry
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