Report Change what is attractive? in Relationships, Love, Sex, Romance Posted July 25, 2010 Nor am I denying the importance of sexual attraction, which is partly physical (although sexuality is more importantly a function of the mind and not the body). But the OP as well as many Objectivists tend to treat real live people as if they were characters out of one of Rand's novels. The simple truth is that so-called God given looks and character + personality have ZERO causal connection. Certain things do, such as overall physical *condition* and hygiene because those are under direct volitional control. And so those should be given primacy over physical attributes that are totally outside the control of the individual, such as how long one's legs are or one's height. But the OP seems to be focusing on physical attributes to the outright exclusion of personality and character. The woman he is with is an amazing person by his own admission, but her body isn't good enough so she's unworthy of a romantic relationship. Frankly, that is the definition of shallow. If your standards of what is physically attractive have that little wiggle room, then I don't really see how you are capable of a healthy romantic relationship. Here's a thought, have you ever considered going to the gym with your girlfriend, or going on bike rides, or doing something physical? If her "unattractiveness" stems from too much body fat, or whatever you consider too much, then maybe you can work out together and she will lose that as a result.