My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost six months. In the beginning, we worked really well together. About two or three months in, he introduced me to Atlas Shrugged, which I read and loved. It seemed very right to me, and I wanted to become an Objectivist. But ever since then, we've fought off and on, because he's been pushing me to become more objectivist. It's been difficult. I've never fought my parents before. They are rather strict and not very flexible, generally nice people, but not objectivists at all. I've been pushing more and more for what I want (when I think it's right and it makes sense), like spending more time with my boyfriend. Last Monday things finally escalated. My BF was very upset with me because I had cancelled on him/not been able to hang out over the past three weeks, because I had been grounded and though I tried to fight it a few times, it was always a huge struggle, I never got to hang with him because of the fights with my parents, and they were threatening to kick me out (or try to send me to another state). So I went over to his house after school to try to make it up to him. My mom showed up about half an hour in, and then my dad came a few hours later. We argued for almost four hours outside his house. By some miracle, we came to a compromise in which I could have more freedom if I kept on top of what I needed to (I have a busy schedule). Tuesday we were going to hang out, but I forgot about an appointment I had at the same time. I had an event scheduled later that night, but it got cut down. So I would've had time to make it up to him, but I didn't think of it; I put it off to Wednesday. So he started telling me that I didn't make time for him. He cancelled something Wednesday so we could hang out on the condition that I went snowboarding with him and a friend that weekend. I shouldn't have agreed. I should've known I wouldn't have been able to convince my parents. I didn't want to lose everything I had gained... I thought I had it all, but I stopped thinking. Now he's breaking up with me, tired of not being able to see me and always taking on a paternal role of reprimanding me for my mistakes and lack of thought. I love him so much even though we've grown apart because of my grounding and all the fighting... what can you do when you face a life of grey, a life without joy and color, but you know up until now you've never been able to do enough to keep it anyway....? What can you do? How do you feel more passionately? I feel like there's something wrong with me... I can feel the deepest sadness (that I know) but I can't fulfill my potential for joy... I don't feel passionately about what's right, even when I know it is... I mean, sometimes I do. Like when I went to his house Monday... but other times I feel like I can't move... what's wrong with me? Sorry, I don't want to sound like a person who just complains and does nothing. Not objectivist of me. But I don't know what to do anymore. Don't hold back in your criticism or anything you want to say.