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Sorry about that - my purpose was to display how it is improper to speculate on the basis that he was, and I tried to be clear that I was not saying any of those things applied to you.

Indeed. And logically, I believe this follows: to say one is engaging in "casual sex," i.e. to attempt to treat things casually even though such strong emotions must be involved, is itself irrational.

I don't see how Inspector could agree with JMegan's view because that is essentially mine worded differently. While she says that it is impossible to have sex with someone who is of no value to you, I say it is possible, but is immoral and depraved. My position is that you have sex with someone who has elicited at least some positive assessment of values from you, even if those values are not necessarily spiritual values and even if you don't know the full premises behind their profession of their spiritual values. (This does not apply to ideal romantic sex.)

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Well, this is new, people talking about my relationships. (Thanks for being polite, Inspector.) I think the context of all my statements is being completely ignored.

This is completely off the mark. Some people don't like casual intimacy even after you've slept with them (my ex didn't, and I don't like people groping me when I'm working, either). Yes, after you've slept with someone you may still need to properly re-establish boundaries for casual intimacy, especially in public. I may have allowed you to use my body for your enjoyment but it's still *mine*.

That's not to say that it can't be a turn-on when people take liberties, but it has to be done correctly. If it isn't, it can be terrifying.

I am not talking about public displays of affection, I think you are taking a conceptual overview of a principle that I am trying to convey and applying it to a small, and mostly irrelevant situation, missing the gist of what I am saying. The point is, if you've made love to someone, there should be no awkwardness in your mind if you spoon or kiss in the morning afterward. If you don't like spooning at all, that's a different story. And I'm not talking about smacking lips at a restaurant or unwelcomed groping.

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