ChrlBrooks Posted October 20, 2009 Report Share Posted October 20, 2009 I have decided to initiate my renouncement of my religious faith here in OO.forum. Why here and not my friends first? The reason, I believe, it is a fear I have amongst my peers and what they will consider of me. It disturbs me most to listen and hear them disassociate my decision. Why does it care? To me, actually It doesn't, but I do fear I will loose all the fortunate relationships that would've grown if I were honest to them before. I came here to find courage and solace, as I take my journey to become the self I had abandoned, to extinguish the fears of opposition from my family and friends, whom I felt utter indifference. I want to briefly describe how devastating this is for me. It was this conflict of my reality that I had become a chronic masturbation, unable to admire value for my acquaintances, I became a bitter, abhorrent self-immolation, that in my hidden contempt I could only find pleasure for myself. I venerate renounced closet homosexuals that extol their decision as a sanctification, for it is I who hides in the closet of a belief structure I tried to comply. I realized I dishonored my family, friends, and myself. I was the biggest lie to them all. If I could show that I love them for they loving me for what I decide, then I can resume they as my value. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jackethan Posted October 20, 2009 Report Share Posted October 20, 2009 You don't "Dishonor" anybody, this isn't ancient China. You made some mistakes. Now you can rectify them. If your family and friends dislike you for being honest with yourself and being true to reality, then they don't really have much worth as friends do they? Less self pity, and more celebration. You've graduated into the real world now! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zip Posted October 21, 2009 Report Share Posted October 21, 2009 Well said Jack. Chrl, today is the first day of the best of your life! Welcome. Nice Blog BTW... I take it you did the art on those shoes, you should post some of your stuff in the Aesthetics section. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChrlBrooks Posted October 21, 2009 Author Report Share Posted October 21, 2009 You don't "Dishonor" anybody, this isn't ancient China. You made some mistakes. Now you can rectify them. If your family and friends dislike you for being honest with yourself and being true to reality, then they don't really have much worth as friends do they? Less self pity, and more celebration. You've graduated into the real world now! Thanks Jack! I feel less pity every time I renounce I'm not a christian, and I find it ironic those who object are the ones that are pity now. It's a shame for them that it's fuel to their fire, to raise a bonfire for my bewitching. Unfortunately, unbeknown to them I'll be rejoicing and kicking dirt in their immolation, watching their flames stifle. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChrlBrooks Posted October 21, 2009 Author Report Share Posted October 21, 2009 Well said Jack. Chrl, today is the first day of the best of your life! Welcome. Nice Blog BTW... I take it you did the art on those shoes, you should post some of your stuff in the Aesthetics section. Thanks Zip, even though it is a party alone, I never known this piece of the cake to taste so good. mmm... Great observation, I will look into the Aesthetics forum and make several post of my shoe designs. Special note to Jack, he was right about one thing, even though its not intentional...[ Honor] I always wondered why I felt like a Samurai, their code was self-sacrifice, but I'm not a samurai. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Individual Posted October 21, 2009 Report Share Posted October 21, 2009 I have decided to initiate my renouncement of my religious faith here in OO.forum. Why here and not my friends first? The reason, I believe, it is a fear I have amongst my peers and what they will consider of me. It disturbs me most to listen and hear them disassociate my decision. Why does it care? To me, actually It doesn't, but I do fear I will loose all the fortunate relationships that would've grown if I were honest to them before. I came here to find courage and solace, as I take my journey to become the self I had abandoned, to extinguish the fears of opposition from my family and friends, whom I felt utter indifference. I want to briefly describe how devastating this is for me. It was this conflict of my reality that I had become a chronic masturbation, unable to admire value for my acquaintances, I became a bitter, abhorrent self-immolation, that in my hidden contempt I could only find pleasure for myself. I venerate renounced closet homosexuals that extol their decision as a sanctification, for it is I who hides in the closet of a belief structure I tried to comply. I realized I dishonored my family, friends, and myself. I was the biggest lie to them all. If I could show that I love them for they loving me for what I decide, then I can resume they as my value. Welcome to the real world. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoldierB Posted November 23, 2009 Report Share Posted November 23, 2009 (edited) Hey Chrlbrooks good to see you have found a new place to call home. I feel what you are going thru. My family raised me catholic and even though the message is good and everything just one day I just started feeling wierd about all the old traditions. A few months back one of my buddies told me to read Atlas and it changed my whole view on everything. It was strange cause like I said I am cool with catholics like my family but I felt like Atlas Shrugged was something that made sense to me. Its hard to explain but thats why we are here to find answers. I dont really go to church anymore cause I have been busy but I know if I told my family they would freak out and it makes me mad cause we all have the right to be independent and free to do what we want and I dont want anything to hide from people I care about you know? So I know what it feels like. Be strong and feel good. This is my 1st time here as well so hello everybody. This is a nice website. Edited November 23, 2009 by SoldierB Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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