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Computer Rage

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I have a pretty serious problem with computer rage. In the last two years, I've destroyed two laptops and a monitor. What always happens is, the computer malfunctions somehow, and suddenly this deamon in me comes out and I physically attack the computer in a fit of rage. After the last time, when I kicked the LCD monitor off the desk, I swore up and down that I would never do anything like that again. Then, this morning, in my single worst episode yet, I grabbed my laptop by the screen and slammed it against the desk repeatedly because a webpage failed to load. There was nothing wrong with the computer; it was all the website's fault. I don't know why I do this and I am totally disgusted with myself. I have never been violent toward anything other than computers, never punched a hole through the drywall or anything like that. For some reason, a malfunctioning computer makes me angrier than anything in the world. I don't know what to do but I consider the problem very serious. I never want to break another computer again (for financial reasons mainly). How do I address this terrible flaw in my personality?

Edited by cliveandrews
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Seems you're putting rationality on hold. You clearly recognize your actions as irrational after the outburst. The trick is to recognize your actions as irrational while you're considering an outburst.

Here's how I deal with stress: see how much I can take before cracking - and, of course, I very rarely crack (perhaps once every decade) because I'm always trying to push my stress level. When you feel the anger coming on, recognize that you're angry and try to determine why you're angry. What stimulus is causing you to be angry? Usually, that will do the trick - it's the one moment you need to gain control of your emotions again. It's like taking a deep breath. If that's not enough, try to see how much more stress you can take before cracking. Make a game of it. "Yeah, you *#[email protected], you've pissed me off. Bet you can't do anything else to piss me off even more." Laugh at it. Walk away.

The point is to give yourself time to allow the hold you're putting on rationality to end and for thinking to come back on-line.

Edited by JeffS
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Seems you're putting rationality on hold. You clearly recognize your actions as irrational after the outburst. The trick is to recognize your actions as irrational while you're considering an outburst.

Considering we're speaking of an instantaneous emotional reaction, there probably is little possibility of thoughtfully considering actions right when an outburst occurs. Now I really wouldn't know what to suggest to alter this emotional reaction, but I would agree that the best the OP himself could do is try to figure out exactly what it is he is angry at. Is it *just* the acting up of computer related stuff? Or is it some particular type of activity that its disruption causes extreme distress, say, interruption of playing a game?

Edited by Eiuol
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For some reason, a malfunctioning computer makes me angrier than anything in the world.

Have you considered studying how computers work? Taking a compsci class might be able to help you, as next time your computer malfunctions, you'll at least be able to recognize why and put a technical term on your predicament. I've noticed a similar trait of my own that has me getting exceedingly frustrated when things don't go my way, and I have little or no knowledge of the problem and therefore no idea what I might do about it (calculus and girls are my most imposing stimuli).

If your frustration stems from a feeling of helplessness that arises when you look at a "404" screen with no earthly idea what might be going wrong behind that mysterious contraption of wires and lights, then I definitely recommend reading up on computer science; greater knowledge of your problem will help you shed some rational light on it, and that will help you behave rationally about it in the future.

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According to this what you describe is Intermittent explosive disorder (IED). it postulates that a person who has this does not have the capacity to resist the impulse.

I wonder at the state of psychiatry, by this I mean they (psychiatrist) lump a bunch of observed behaviors together and call it some name. Is psychiatry the worst medical science when it comes to being an objective science?

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