Maybe you could help

[haqverdi]

Hi. I am 21, and deeply depressed. It all started when I begin studying abroad. Actually, before that, when I entered university. I studied hard to enter the university, it became my purpose of life. But when that hard-working times finished, I was confused. I was alone in the face of life. I lived for my family, to make them happy, I entered a good university. But when I entered the university, I was confused. Maybe I couldn't take to live for myself, I had to think about.

But the real problem is today. I've been studying abroad for 3 years. These three years was the hardest times of my life. I am still confused, and that has changed me. And gave me a depression. And caused a total failure in my university life. Now I cannot take to study, its looks meaningless. I don't want to sacrifice myself for others anymore. I am thinking about quiting the university, or rest some time.

But if I quit, my family should have to pay much money, because government was paying my charges. If I quit, the government will want that money back. There is a possibility that, they won't. Anyway, its the scariest thing I heard. I can't do that to my family. And the other option - a vacation, the government says its not possible.

What should I do? If I just keep trying to study, I am afraid I will fail and all of my life will be undone. What I know is I have to do something about that. I am going to a psychologist which gives me anti-depressants, some kind of drugs. But it didn't work since now.

Thanks to all of you who reading this. Please forgive me for my bad english.

Edited July 2, 2011 by haqverdi

[bluecherry]

Go to your college guidance center and speak to a counselor there. If your college is anything like the one I've been to, if you explain your situation they will be able to give you some paper work to fill out to take a semester or so off from school because of your depression. This official time off from school for mental health reasons at least in the United States has made it possible for one to put on hold the requirement to pay back the loans because it makes clear you are not quitting school, you do intend to finish, and that you are off from school due to necessity, not just for fun. Furthermore, how long have you been taking the anti-depressants? They typically take around a month to reach full effectiveness, so don't be surprised if after a week you haven't noticed much yet. Additionally, you may need to get a higher dosage of your medication, try another type of medication in addition to your current medication, or change medications as it is in fact quite common for people's first prescription for anti-depressants to not end up being what works best for them. Also, are you seeing a psychologist regularly in addition to the psychiatrist who prescribed you the medication? Anti-depressants are not generally a solution all on their own so much as something which may enable a psychologist to help a patient who had physical complications which were standing in the way of being able to make progress on healing up psychologically.

[haqverdi]

Go to your college guidance center and speak to a counselor there. If your college is anything like the one I've been to, if you explain your situation they will be able to give you some paper work to fill out to take a semester or so off from school because of your depression. This official time off from school for mental health reasons at least in the United States has made it possible for one to put on hold the requirement to pay back the loans because it makes clear you are not quitting school, you do intend to finish, and that you are off from school due to necessity, not just for fun. Furthermore, how long have you been taking the anti-depressants? They typically take around a month to reach full effectiveness, so don't be surprised if after a week you haven't noticed much yet. Additionally, you may need to get a higher dosage of your medication, try another type of medication in addition to your current medication, or change medications as it is in fact quite common for people's first prescription for anti-depressants to not end up being what works best for them. Also, are you seeing a psychologist regularly in addition to the psychiatrist who prescribed you the medication? Anti-depressants are not generally a solution all on their own so much as something which may enable a psychologist to help a patient who had physical complications which were standing in the way of being able to make progress on healing up psychologically.

Actually, the university says the semester off is possible. But the government who pays me says its not possible according to my agreement of shcolarship.

About the anti-depressants, I have been taking them 4 or 5 weeks. No, I have just seen the psychiatrist who prescribes me the medication. Allright then, I am gonna find a psychologist. Or should I go find a psychotherapist?

[bluecherry]

I'm not sure if there is really a difference between a psychologist and a psychotherapist, but if there is, I'd go with a psychologist. Check and make sure you go see somebody who has gotten their degree in psychology too. Also, you've actually asked the people in the counseling center about this, not just another part of the school? Different departments of schools often don't communicate very well with each other and they may not know all the specifics about what the other departments offer and require and such. EDIT: Oh wait, I misread what you said. Nevermind, see below about the scholarships instead then. As far as scholarships go, if you would lose a scholarship if you took a semester off due to mental health trouble, but you would probably fail if you don't take some time off, wouldn't this also make you lose the scholarships? If either way you'll lose the scholarships, it seems to me that you may as well not waste more time and get more frustrated and further damage your academic record by going down the path of staying in school and failing. In fact, staying and failing a semester would probably end up causing you to waste more money because you'd have to pay for that whole semester still, but it would get you no closer to completing your degree. Have you tried calling the place responsible for the loans and the scholarships to ask them directly about your situation? I found out about the ability to put off payments on student loans by calling the place that does the loans directly and they set things up with me over the phone. EDIT 2: Oh, and if you do call and ask about it, mention that if you take any time off you would be doing so with an arrangement with the school about the time off for mental health reasons. Making sure they know that you aren't taking time off just for fun is important.

Edited July 2, 2011 by bluecherry

[Dennis Hardin]

About the anti-depressants, I have been taking them 4 or 5 weeks. No, I have just seen the psychiatrist who prescribes me the medication. Allright then, I am gonna find a psychologist. Or should I go find a psychotherapist?

A psychologist is simply a psychotherapist with a Ph.D. The mere fact that a therapist has a Ph.D. means nothing about their level of competence or counseling skills. It simply means the person has more formal education than a master’s level therapist. Many master’s level counselors are extremely effective therapists, because they spent more time doing therapy than writing a thesis.

Because you are dealing with depression, you would be well advised to look for a therapist (regardless of their specific license) who specializes in cognitive-behavioral therapy. CBT has been shown to be particularly effective with depression.

You can simply ask the prospective therapist if they are experienced with CBT (or REBT—rational emotive behavioral therapy, Albert Ellis’s version of CBT—which is very similar).

Incidentally, there are a lot of similarities between cognitive behavioral techniques and Objectivist epistemology/psychology. For instance, the CBT toolkit includes the so-called “downward arrow” technique. It is designed to help clients discover the deeper thoughts which underlie their conscious thinking. In other words, to “check your premises.”

Asking a therapist if he/she knows what the "downward arrow" technique is, might be a good way to test their expertise with CBT.

[patrik 7-2321]

Can't you change program at your university to something more meaningful?

[Nigel]

Just a thought, I know that the university that I went to had an office where psychologists provided free therapy. It was graduate students who were close to graduating and about go into their own practices. I went to a large university in America though. Also, although the school is often not very helpful, talking to your teachers individually might be a little better. Often times they are more than willing to give you some extra time or whatever. It sort of built in to their leftist altruist personalities, but take advantage of it. You would be surprised at some of the things they might do for you.

As far as your studies seeming pointless, your probably right. Most of it you will never use regardless of what you study. The amount of knowledge retained by university graduates is abysmal. Unfortunately, to be employable, you need to struggle though it. I forget where the quote was, but I read some Ayn Rand quote about sucking it up and doing your best to ignore the contradictory nature of a university, because being employable is a necessity.

[haqverdi]

I'm not sure if there is really a difference between a psychologist and a psychotherapist, but if there is, I'd go with a psychologist. Check and make sure you go see somebody who has gotten their degree in psychology too. Also, you've actually asked the people in the counseling center about this, not just another part of the school? Different departments of schools often don't communicate very well with each other and they may not know all the specifics about what the other departments offer and require and such. EDIT: Oh wait, I misread what you said. Nevermind, see below about the scholarships instead then. As far as scholarships go, if you would lose a scholarship if you took a semester off due to mental health trouble, but you would probably fail if you don't take some time off, wouldn't this also make you lose the scholarships? If either way you'll lose the scholarships, it seems to me that you may as well not waste more time and get more frustrated and further damage your academic record by going down the path of staying in school and failing. In fact, staying and failing a semester would probably end up causing you to waste more money because you'd have to pay for that whole semester still, but it would get you no closer to completing your degree. Have you tried calling the place responsible for the loans and the scholarships to ask them directly about your situation? I found out about the ability to put off payments on student loans by calling the place that does the loans directly and they set things up with me over the phone. EDIT 2: Oh, and if you do call and ask about it, mention that if you take any time off you would be doing so with an arrangement with the school about the time off for mental health reasons. Making sure they know that you aren't taking time off just for fun is important.

You're right, I must go for a vacation.

Calling the place responsible for the loans is a very good idea. I will definitely try it. But I think I have more chances to convince them to give me a vacation when I go to my country. I will mention about the depression. Thank you so much!

[haqverdi]

A psychologist is simply a psychotherapist with a Ph.D. The mere fact that a therapist has a Ph.D. means nothing about their level of competence or counseling skills. It simply means the person has more formal education than a master’s level therapist. Many master’s level counselors are extremely effective therapists, because they spent more time doing therapy than writing a thesis.

Because you are dealing with depression, you would be well advised to look for a therapist (regardless of their specific license) who specializes in cognitive-behavioral therapy. CBT has been shown to be particularly effective with depression.

You can simply ask the prospective therapist if they are experienced with CBT (or REBT—rational emotive behavioral therapy, Albert Ellis’s version of CBT—which is very similar).

Incidentally, there are a lot of similarities between cognitive behavioral techniques and Objectivist epistemology/psychology. For instance, the CBT toolkit includes the so-called “downward arrow” technique. It is designed to help clients discover the deeper thoughts which underlie their conscious thinking. In other words, to “check your premises.”

Asking a therapist if he/she knows what the "downward arrow" technique is, might be a good way to test their expertise with CBT.

This information will be very helpful for me. I am currently talking with a counceling agency. I will ask them about CBT therapy and "downward arrow" technique. Thank you very much!

[haqverdi]

Can't you change program at your university to something more meaningful?

I'm sorry. I didn't understand your response :/

[haqverdi]

Just a thought, I know that the university that I went to had an office where psychologists provided free therapy. It was graduate students who were close to graduating and about go into their own practices. I went to a large university in America though. Also, although the school is often not very helpful, talking to your teachers individually might be a little better. Often times they are more than willing to give you some extra time or whatever. It sort of built in to their leftist altruist personalities, but take advantage of it. You would be surprised at some of the things they might do for you.

As far as your studies seeming pointless, your probably right. Most of it you will never use regardless of what you study. The amount of knowledge retained by university graduates is abysmal. Unfortunately, to be employable, you need to struggle though it. I forget where the quote was, but I read some Ayn Rand quote about sucking it up and doing your best to ignore the contradictory nature of a university, because being employable is a necessity.

Talking to my teachers will be some good. You're right. But past semesters, I wasn't able to do this, I was so anxious that I am gonna kicked out, I was blocked

[bluecherry]

I'm glad to hear you found stuff here helpful. Patrik was asking if you could change what subject you are majoring in at school to something you were more interested in, in case the subject you are studying is a large contributor to why you find school so unpleasant rather than the schooling itself being problematic no matter what.

[haqverdi]

I'm glad to hear you found stuff here helpful. Patrik was asking if you could change what subject you are majoring in at school to something you were more interested in, in case the subject you are studying is a large contributor to why you find school so unpleasant rather than the schooling itself being problematic no matter what.

Well, I hate my major now. I think that is because of the depression maybe. I now have interest some other subjects. But I think if that subjects become my major, I will hate them too. And my major, that was only thing I can do better. The other subjects attracts my interest, but I guess they're not for me. I don't know, maybe I should change. But its too risky. And its forbidden too. That gives me a reason not to think about that for now.