http://tennessean.com/apps/pbcs.dll/articl…NTY10/807250394
Read all about it! Sounds boring as hell to me.
Wilson County, TN is my home of residence, at least on paper. I’ve never lived there, but my Dad does, and there’s no state income tax.
I wonder if they’ll have a roller coaster where you ride standing up, you know… with your arms straight out to each side…
Go on the ride of perpetual guilt! No one will leave this ride…Without feeling a profound self-hatred!
I actually think there could be money made in a Bible themed amusement park.
Think about it. For rides, you could have a Pillar of Fire themed sky-drop. Or a chariot roller coaster that ends with the parted Red Sea collapsing on park-goers.
For park games you could have your classic strong-man hammer game, only you pound nails into the body of Christ instead of hitting a plastic button. Or you could have a battle game in which you play Joshua on a mission to slaughter the heathen hordes who dared to sleep with Jewish women!
What do you sell at the concession stands? Why, gram-cracker crucifixes and chocolate covered communion wafers of course.
I hope they let people ride on mechanical raptors… you know, because Jesus rode on dinosaurs and all.
I actually think there could be money made in a Bible themed amusement park.
I was thinking the same thing. You could have a “Space Mountain” style roller coaster that takes you down through the hell-fires of perdition. Or you could relive the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah. Or splash your way through the rapids on Noah’s Ark at the “Walk on Water Park.” Or ride along with The Four Horsemen as the wreak havoc on the planet. Hours of fun for the whole family.
Or a Garden Of Eden adult section :dough:
I can’t wait to ride the Holy-Roller Coaster.
it’s the “Catechism Catapult” all the way for me.
How about the Leap of Faith:
You spend 2 hours in a line climbing to the top of a tower. At the top, you jump off and pray to God that A is not A, and the ground won’t kill you…
How about the Leap of Faith:
You spend 2 hours in a line climbing to the top of a tower. At the top, you jump off and pray to God that A is not A, and the ground won’t kill you…
Or, how about you spend four hours in a line that winds and winds, only to find that there was no ride after all, and now the park is closing?
I think you all are being incredibly blasphemous. According to the brochure that was left on my front door yesterday by a local church, we are all sinners, we all need to be saved and we cannot save ourselves. Shame on you! Burn in hell, sinners! 
Seriously, y’all are cracking me up. I love it! 
I think you all are being incredibly blasphemous.
Thank you.
According to the brochure that was left on my front door yesterday by a local church, we are all sinners, we all need to be saved and we cannot save ourselves.
Just to be clear, what are we supposed to be saved from? While we’re on the subject, what’s their rescue plan?
From eternal damnation, don’t ya know?
Among the many things they suggest you do in order to be saved, “Pray daily and throughout the day.”
From eternal damnation, don’t ya know?
Really? I had no idea I was eternally damned (except when the subway gets stuck between stations in May). In any case, damned by whom? I’ve heard people tell other people “damn you!” and it doesn’t seem to ahve any effect. Suggestions of incestous sexual relations, or anatomically impossible actions related to sex, do at elast geta rise out of the target (sometimes).
Among the many things they suggest you do in order to be saved, “Pray daily and throughout the day.”
That’s nice, I suppose, if you like being bored out of your mind several hours each day (of course, you can just ride the subway from end to end, and be bored at the government’s expense). But what do endless flattery of imaginary beings get you, exactly? A better chance at winning in lotto, or choosing the right horse at the track? I mean, I’ve seen very pious and devoted people engaged in such activities. I know a bout praying to God to get the other team to miss a field goal, but that’s seasonal and the spread can go either way; surely God is more reliable and available than that.
No, no, no. It’s “prey” daily and throughout the day. As in eat lots of meat.
Pisses PeTA off pretty badly which is an added benefit.
Of course when the church suggests you pray, they are preying on you.
As for that last comment, it will never cease to amaze me how people in adversarial/competitive situations (like sports) can claim their prayers were answered (so therefore prayer works) whilst not seeming to realize that surely the OTHER team’s prayers were not answered (and therefore their prayers did not work). Of course the slightly less moronic theists will state that all prayers are answered, it’s just that often you don’t like the answer.
You all realize I was kidding, right?
Or a Garden Of Eden adult section
I am so there.
I’m also looking forward to the freefall at the Tower of Babble.