Let’s see- how I’ve changed since adoptiong Objectivist ideas (laughs).
To start, I’m just going to note that this is a story more than anything else, about how my life has changed rather than my thoughts or ideals.
I used to be Christian. Not a strong one, mind- I was one of those CE (Christmas & Easter) Christians, mostly because I could not accept the Bible as an historical book, and I had major issues with certain sects of the religion (Catholicism, mostly.) However, I was Christian enough for my boyfriend’s parents to allow us to date- his family’s Evangelical, and his dad’s a pastor. For those who have no idea what Evangelicals believe (at least, these ones in particular) as compared to other Christians, they’re the ones who think the Earth is 10,000 years old, there were dinosaurs on the ark, Mary was actually a virgin, etc. In other words, the Bible to the letter. Our religious differences didn’t bother us very much- he would never try to ‘convert’ me unless I wanted to do so myself, and though I continuously tried to convince him that evolution was the way to go, I wouldn’t push the subject far. Every other aspect of our relationship was great- we were on the same level intellectually, though he worked harder in school, and we’d been best friends for years before it got serious. We’d dated a couple times before, but it didn’t work out and we always went back to being friends. The last time we tried was different- we were more deeply in love, and I was starting to think we would get married.
I had read The Fountainhead before, and I had read Atlas Shrugged before, but neither of them had made a great impact on me (I was young and didn’t fully understand what Ayn Rand was saying.) But then I read Atlas Shrugged again.
Suddenly I was an athiest, or agnostic at best. I wanted to continue my relationship with my boyfriend even with this ‘setback’, because I believed we would be able to work through the religious differences. But as I said, he was a true Evangelist- and there’s a sentence in the Bible that says “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?” (II Corinthians 6:14) This, of course, says that Christians should not marry non-Christians. It took a week for the man I thought I would marry to decide he could no longer date me.
Seven months later, I am more fully involved with Objectivism, although to claim to be an Objectivist at this stage would be hypocritical, as I’d have to accept many of the ideas contained within it on faith since I have not had time to think through all of them myself yet. But I will no longer attempt to date anyone who believes that sacrifice is a virtue, or anyone who will believe something without proof. Overall, it was definately in my self-interest to read that book- my relationship with my family has also changed, and I am learning to love myself in a way that’s been nearly impossible for most of my life.
I’m still best friends with him. I value his company, and he values mine, mostly because we can talk about anything without turning it into an argument. My core values have changed enough that all attraction I had towards him has disappeared entirely, and we’re truly just friends. Instead, I have found someone else, a man who’s intelligent, funny, ambitious, and shares my highest ideals and moral code. He has been helping me along my path towards Objectivism, understanding when I have relapses and let my emotions affect me without thinking through them. As long as we continue to reason out the things we differ on, as we have been, then we’ll probably… well. It’s still early to think that way, and he’s probably going to read this.
Objectivism has changed who and how I love. Thank God for that! 