Pondering Suicide

Ethics
1

I’ve been pondering taking my life qua self-liberation. Self-liberation, in part, from the socialism of the status quo, but primarily from psycho-epistemological escapism.

I don’t want to live a life of purposelessness. But it seems to me that, due to my fucked-up psycho-epistemology, suicide might just be the only plausible moral course of action for me. I’m increasingly starting to believe that my psycho-epistemology has been so thoroughly fucked up by my past experiences that suicide is my only option if I don’t want to become a Peter Keating. Or maybe I’m just a stupid teen.

I think my psycho-epistemology might have just made a rational life impossible to me.

At birth, a child’s mind is tabula rasa; he has the potential of awareness—the mechanism of a human consciousness—but no content. Speaking metaphorically, he has a camera with an extremely sensitive, unexposed film (his conscious mind), and an extremely complex computer waiting to be programmed (his subconscious). Both are blank. He knows nothing of the external world. (Ayn Rand)

2

Man, that is serious. You must see a Psychiatrist immediately. It must be a psychiatrist, not a psychologist. The reason is that these things can be organic in origin (eg low testosterone) that only an MD can sort out. It happened to a friend of mine who just got worse seeing a psychologist. I convinced him to see a psychiatrist I knew who subspecialised in psychiatric/psyshological disorders caused by underlying diseases (he was the first to diagnose my psoriatic arthritis, believe it or not, from a sudden fear of flying - autoimmune diseases scramble brain chemicals). He diagnosed my friend’s low testosterone immediately, and sleep studies showed he had sleep-apnea so bad that, if left untreated, he would be dead in 5 years.

This is no laughing matter. Book an appointment now.