I found Objectivism at a very impressionable age, 18, and it definitely affected my outlook on the world. I was already an idealist and had preconceived notions regarding judging people and the world. I used Objectivism to rationalize judging others harshly, and actively dimissed anyone who did not fit into the perfect Objectivist rendition of a heroic character. My psychology became composed of “shoulds”, and had an almost puritannical fashion of always being productive and purposeful, pursuing only “rational values”, and loving only those who were 100% rational. As one would imagine this can be an isolating experience, but I thought it was the natural course of being an Objectivist. Then I began to wonder why I wasn’t happy, any why people who werent Objectivist were, or even though who were Objectivists and not as puritannical about it as me were. Thats when I realized the disconnect between using the philosophy as a guide to live ones life and issuing myself commandments. The former is a natural methodology that should be seamlessly integrated to one’s life and actions, while the other borders on compulsive behavior.
It took me a few years to realize that Objectivism is just a set of principles/guidelines to live and enjoy your life, and to not beat myself up as long as I wasn’t being self-destructive. But sometimes I still think that the demanding nature of my personality (being ambitious, hard-working, and introspective) conflicts with enjoying myself or establishing friendships with others.
I’ve been reading Edith Packer’s pamphlets in order understand human psychology, as well as improve my own. But I was curious to know if anyone else has had this sort of experience, or how discovering Objectivism has impacted their transition to adulthood.
~Poornima