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carriew7

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Posts posted by carriew7

  1. Thank you both for your encouragement, and appreciation.

    Felipe, I think that "Shaping ones surroundings in the image of one's values and sense of life" is the only thing to do if you are a value oriented person. It has taken a lot of work to even come to the point of actively pursuing values and having that as your main orientation towards life.

    Yes, I have surrounded myself with beautiful art, amazing people and knowledge. But it still takes a lot to not let the negativity of the world bother me.

    Burgess,

    You are most certainly welcome. And I want to say, Thank you, for being an inspiration to me. From what I know of your writing and what you write about, you are a very worthy role model. I love to read all your posts. They wonderfully exemplify good, clear, prestine thinking. I learn a lot from what you have to say.

    ~Carrie~ AKA~ free spirit

  2. There is something on a small scale that I am nonetheless proud of that I did last week.

    I am a hairstylist, and there is a forum for hairstylists that I am a member of. It's forum where we talk about everything that has to do with the industry, from new haircutting techniques, colors, products ect....

    One day last week, I log on, and see this awful thread called "A series of unfortunate events". (!) The description was "Ever had a bad day where everything seems to go wrong? A color turned out bad, you get a moody client, your haircut is off....?"

    Well, needless to say I was very repulsed at this topic. I can understand healthy venting where one can let off steam, and get constructive advice/discussion, but not a place where one just complains!

    So, I wrote an e-mail to one of the moderators, and suggested we have a thread that discussed our achievements. Where we discussed why we are in this industry, what we love about it, and what our goals are. I told her that I think it would be great to be able to brag and share stories of our success, and accomplishments.

    So, there is now a new thread entitled "I am so proud of...." :)

    I am personally proud of this because I have done something to bring my values into my world. Let me elaborate.

    Aside from many other things, I want a world where I can wake up, and be surrounded by proud people who are achieving, positive and are benevolent. I want to be able to share my successes with people who are worthy and can appreciate them........

    So everytime I look at that thread, that is what I think of, and I smile to myself and love how receptive people have been to it!! ;)

  3. Unconquered,

    "Average dpression" is what half or more than half of what society expereinces. It is the feeling of hopelessness, of worthlessness. The total absence of any self-confidence. Malevolent view, fatalistic view. The feeling that life isn't worth living.

    The person doesn't want to do anything, doesn't want to work, bathe, clean achieve, nothing. Total lack of motivation, values, and often contemplates/ attempts death.

    What do you mean by SSRI drugs *work*. If my serotonin levels were unbalanced like the doctor said they were, why am I no longer depressed? (Without the drugs)

    What depression are you talking about? What are it's characteristics?

    Correction: I don't want to generalize. "Average depression" is what half or more than half of society experiences to some degree.

  4. JMeganSnow,

    Interesting question!!

    I have never been really scared of death. Before Objectivism, I have never realized the true beauty and value of life like I do now.

    When I think of death now, I feel a huge sense of sadness, a sense of a huge loss. I don't want to leave, I love being alive, I don't want to miss out on anything.

    I could easily live for another 3-4 hundred years. I would learn and do soo many things!! I don't ever want to leave, but I wouldn't have it any other way, because like you mentioned, "it is only the concept 'life' that makes values possible."

    Kind of bittersweet......

    ~Carrie~

  5. Some kinds of depression are certainly treatable by drugs, commonly the SSRI class of drugs, and frankly I have contempt for any self-described psychiatrist or psychologist, regardless of their self-description as an Objectivist, who thinks that somebody can just "think their way out of depression".

    Unconquered,

    I would have to disagree with you on a certain level on this.

    Excluding Alzhiemer's, Autism, (Shcizpohrenia) ect...... I think that average deprssion CAN be overcome by a rational mind, and with the help of a rational psychotherapist like PhD. Ellen Kenner, or PhD. Michael.J.Hurd.

    I have had personal experience. I was diagnosed as "depressed" about 5 years ago. I went to a psychologist, and was put on Paxil because I was told my "ceratonin" levels were unbalanced. I went through a very dark period which I won't get into here. But the point is, is that after getting introduced to Philosophy, studying psychology on my own, and having the courage to face some nasty demons, I made the choice to live and overcome it.

    I truly believe that alot of depression can be overcome by a rational mind, and the will to live. (Mind you many other things are involved, but this is where you would start).

    I am still deciphering to exactly what level we have volition in regards to other mental diseases like shizophrenia ect.....

    I understand that Alziemers and Autism are biological mental diseases and I'm glad that there are medications for that.

    But , I'm talking more along the lines of depression that people would take Zoloft, or Prozac ect... for.

    ~Carrie~

    <<<Edited to fix broken quote--JMeganSnow>>>

  6. Yes, there is a difference. Allow me to illustrate from my personal experience.

    Before Objectivism, I had a peculiar "need" to be with someone, I felt anxious and confused if I didn't have anything to do. I externalized myself so much (focussed on other people) that I never listened to my own wants, needs, thoughts and desires. Just a constant pressure of what other people were thinking.

    Now, after Objectivism, I absolutely LOVE and cherish my alone time. As I've gained my independence, I feel like a solid person with a very rich personality with many facets. I find that the kind of value people now give me is reaffirmation of my values.

    I learn from them, I get a certain type of uplifting energy when I spend time with my loved ones.

    I am a very social creature, I love people!! They're great! But, the important thing, is now there are ME and THEM.

    Not just them.

  7. I think an Objectivist is someone who is rational all the time. They are constantly focussing on the facts. They are always thinking about something, and trying to figure things out. I don't mean that one always needs to be calculating crucial formulas, but they do need to be focussed on reality.

    I also think a constant active expansion of the mind is another requisite. This process and rationality go together. You can't learn if you aren't focussed on the facts.

    That being said, the same goes for applying the virtues. You are obviously NOT an Objectivist if you are holding a contradiction.

    The beautiful world of Benevolence and serenity we all seek to attain mentally, I think is aquired by a process of making your views, convictions and values solid. Most Objectivist think they are going to have this benevolent view by just studying Ayn Rand. There is so much more to it than that.

    For example: I know some of some Objectivists who are always angry and disgusted with the world, in some cases, this is justified. But if you don't aquire independence from them, not care what they do or think and focus on your values, you will be blind to the beauty you think you are fighting for.

    This process takes a long time. Not everyone can be Objectivist instantly. But I do think that whatever your level, as long as you have the requirements stated above, you qualify.

  8. Ahhhh....... I thought this topic would never come up!! Being a hairstylist, I feel right at home in this topic! ;D

    Although I am able to do make-up, my expertise is in hair. Allow me to make a few suggestions on facial shapes and hairstyles.

    The ideal facial shape is oval. In any hairstyle, this is the look you are trying to create.

    If you have:

    - A round face - Go for hairstyles that are either above or below (preferably below) your chin. If you get a chin length bob, it will bring attention to the roundness by framing it. Get some soft layers around the face. It softens the shape and hides a bit of the roundness.

    Always go for a textured (slightly wavy) style. Dead straight hair is not usually flattering for most people as it draws attention to facial flaws.

    - A big forehead - Fringes or bangs are THE solution to this problem. Depending on your size, get light wispy bangs. If you can handle it, go for a more solid perimeter with a little texture to add movement.

    - A long narrow face - Go for a shoulder length cut. Longer hair will just draw you down, adding to the elongation of your face. Ask for lots of layers (depending on your hair type) to create width in the cheekbone area.

    - A small face - Short! If you have fine or smaller features, try to have lots of layers around the face to open it up. I find that too many faces are hidden on small people due to the amount of hair. Don't have too big of hair else it will overwhelm your frame.

    Stay tuned..... for prt. 2!! --- Color!! (And a continuation on cuts)!

    Any questions on beauty, please feel free to contact me!!!

    Take care~~ Carebabe!

    P.S I've been in the industry for 6 years ;D!

  9. Yes, I agree.

    I think that if you aren't telling the other person what you need and want, you aren't being selfish enough. And for someone to give thier all in the relationship, they need to be "at their all" if you will. You can't have a relationship without a strong self..... And I think it's better to wait and actualize your potential than to call the whole thing off, when all along you were right for eachother....

  10. I used to have those "mood swings" also. My doctor put me on medication for it. Now, after having discovered Objectivism, I know there is no such thing as an imbalance. I just needed to root out my contradictions and introspect.

    I have a question. Why does the issue of repression keep coming up among Objectivists? I mean I've even found in myself that I've been hardening towards people. I know that is wrong because I think that is a form of generalizing, but I do know most people deserve it. I've been keeping a close eye on myself, and have noticed that when I'm at peace with myself, or focussing intently on my goals, or just brimming with joy at being alive, it's like people don't even affect me at all. Right now I'm focussing on trying to be in that state constantly.

    This Objectivist Psychologist Edith Packer talks about "core evaluations" aka. core premises about yourself, reality and other people. Now I think that these evaluations are somehow interrelated. From my experience, when things are going great in my life, I feel confident about myself, my view of people changes to be benevolent. I focus on all the great things about the Human species and remind myself that even thought there is a lot of irrationality out there, man is still fundamentally a rational animal.

    It's kinda funny, in my experience, I've learned that if you have a certain idea in your head that you believe is possible, your brain will look for instances to validate that idea, so if you have the idea that people suck and are not worthy of your time or effort you react to that physically ( you tense up, you don't smile, you aren't relaxed) and psychologically you can become bitter, irritable, unhappy.

    I think that the antidote is to strengthen your values and fall passionatley in love with them and the experience of being alive, enjoy people for what they DO have to offer and learn, learn, learn!!!

  11. This is slightly off topic.  It was written after hearing someone one a TV show speak as though Christianity had a monopoly on love.

    I Love

    I love the leaves dancing with the air;

    I love the sun catching women's hair;

    I love the trains roaring into town;

    I love the towers spiring all around.

    I love the bright-faced shops with winking jewels displayed;

    I love the factories stacking, proud of what they've made;

    I love the city lights, the glass-cubed nights,

    the dreams unsleeping that outrace the dawn;

    I love my babe's first step, my boy's first job,

    my girl of science thinking on and on;

    I love good work,  love my life, I love this earth.

    I love the clouds changing, gathering, blackening to storm;

    I love the multitudes of thunder blasting deep, in form.

    I love the daisies, dandelions, roses, silv'ry now with rain;

    I love the fresh sweet smell of life when sunshafts shoot again.

    I love the streets, lawns, fields and parks

    Where children leap and swing----"Push, swing higher!  Toe a leaf!"

    I love the screams of wild delight----"Swing higher!  See!" that know no grief.

    I love the hands that shape some clay into a laughing maze;

    I love the mind that has its way----creative pride ablaze.

    I love the singer singing sweeter, longer,

    the song's words making hearts beat stronger;

    I love the rugged tales of heroes undefeated

    who battle on till everything's completed;

    I love the peace at night in a quiet space;

    I love the eyes of cheer in my mirror's face;

    I love hard work, I love my life, I love this earth.

    I love the trucks and cars, sputt-utt-purring in the morn;

    I love the sparrows cheeping as if they'd just been born;

    I love the ice in winter lying on the wires,

    and the wires' strength that hardly ever tires;

    I love the tree that stands alone, needing but dirt and sky;

    I love the person who stands alone, who needs no others by;

    I love the righteous will that does what it must do;

    I love the self that chooses, and to itself is true;

    I love my self, I love my flesh, I love this earth.

    I love my competence, my striving to do better;

    I love to think my best, speaking, writing song, poem or letter.

    I love rewards for my good work; I love money, silver, gold;

    I love the crinkle, jingle, clink for all I've bought and sold.

    I love walking down the street, running up a hill,

    Tumbling on the grass, lying on the earth, breathing it in;

    I love the feel of joy in thighs and chest and chin.

    I love the truth, I love the beautiful, I love reality;

    I love logic, I love sight, I love love.

    I love and I love and I love.

    I love the child who wakes up singing;

    Though shouts of "Quiet!" try to make him wrong,

    He proudly leaves the house and fills the sky with song.

    I love the girl who's judged just what she wants----

    No matter what the price, it is like gold,

    Because her thinking makes it worth her hold.

    I live the young man cashing his first check----

    He knows he earned it, feels himself supreme,

    And trusts himself to realize every dream.

    I love the man, the man who knows his worth;

    His thoughts, his feelings, actions, all----his own;

    All confidence, competence, effort, gain, are in his mirror shown.

    I love machines; each activating part

    Precisely put together, like a heart

    In smoothly-working perfect health

    That beats and clicks and beats for wealth----

    Wealth of power, speed and youth,

    Accomplishing the highest truth,

    The truth that's in the wheel sped----

    Invention is man's fountainhead.

    I love this pen that's in my hand,

    I love this paper marked with ink;

    I love the things I understand,

    I love the thoughts I love to think.

    I love the sky, I love myself, I love this earth;

    I love and I love and I love.

    Brian Faulkner

    Brian,

    Fist off, it is a pleasure to meet a mind like yours. Being a poetess myself, your poem really touched me. All those things you speak of and more, is what makes life worth living....

    I just want to commend you on your work and hope you continue to do more!!

    Do you have any other peoms you've written?

    ~~ Carrie

  12. Intresca,

    I am in the exact same situation you are in at the present moment, in regard to having a seriously long distance relationship. (I'm in Canada, he's in Australia :S!!)

    I think that yes, long distances can make things difficult, because there are times you don't want to talk, but just hold them....

    But that doesn't mean a great relationship can't be done long distance. It just takes a lot of work.

    I think there are more things in the world to talk about than anyone could have time for. It depends on how much time you spend thinking about things, or what interests you.

    I think that how well you "click" together keeps a flow of convo going. By "click", I mean, psychological visibility. ( That is when you are seen by that other person for who you really are, you are percieved correctly. They "get", understand you. Your sense of life is similar ect...)

    When you have that, there is no limit to what you can talk about. My fiance and I have (almost) literally talked about everything.

    Do you ever share your thoughts about the events of the day, or thoughts about your past? Of people you know or your dreams? Communication is absolutely essential besides self-esteem for the core of a solid relationship.

    I had a relationship where my boyfriend and I literally sat in silence while riding in his jeep. It was so uncomfortable! :S!! We obviously weren't in tune with eachother value or intellectual wise.

    There are also many other factors that could be contributing. Like fear of truly revealing oneself to the other,for whatever reason. Or mabye the distance is getting to you and it's resulting in eventual fading.

    I know that the distance between me and mine gets to me,but I think of how much I love him,and our future together, and I tell myself that a little bit of waiting is worth a lifetime of love.

    In recognizing this, I wish you the best of luck, it may be bittersweet for a while, but it's damn worth it!

    ~~Carrie

  13. Hi everyone!!

    I have a scenario that I would like your feedback on!

    A woman is studying Objectivism, and wants to implement it into her psycho-epistemology.

    Her goal is to go to University, and integrate Objectivism into whatever career she chooses.

    She is starting out with nothing, no help from her parents.

    She wants to save up for it, but realizes, that it will take, probably many years. She also wants to move into her own apartment. The only feesable way to University, is if she applies for OSAP (government funding).

    And she is eligible for that if she is a full -time student. Which means she can only work on weekends.

    She has an option of staying in "subsidized" housing, and being transferred to an appartment of her own. It is based on "rent geared to income" therefore her rent is much cheaper.

    Is it immoral or unethical of her to take this offer up, when it's nearly the only way she can go to school????

    -carrie

  14. If there was no existence of free-will, wouldn't there be no such concept of choice? Mabye you could help them realize that just as in using the concept of existence to deny it, they're using free-will to choose to accept the concept of determinism? Have you read the principles of argumentation? You probably know this already, but I thought I'd get the ball rolling. Plus I'm also trying to crystallize some concepts myself. Well, great luck:)!!! I'll be more help next time! TC!-carrie.

  15. Yes, dating is great. It's fun, exciting, and sweet. Although with my own experience, it's been hard for me to find a man that I'm compatible with because most people aren't intrested in intellectual ideas. I don't mean to put a damper on such a positive topic. But I'm sure most of you would agree! I agree that to know oneself and to have self-esteem is one of the key factors in having a healthy, long term relationship. When it's based on proper values and principles, wow.... it's the most beautiful thing in world...

    -Carrie

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