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Objectivism Online Forum


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Everything posted by Flankert

  1. Thank you all for the responses. I found many of them insightful. I suppose whatever happens will be a great learning experience for me. Thank you.
  2. I am not new to these forums, but I wanted to protect my identity so I made a new account. (Although I haven't posted for years I don't think) Here's my problem: I have been dating a woman for a little more than two years now. I love her to death--she's attractive, smart, witty, comforting. . .basically, everything I could expect from a woman. Our sex life is good. We usually have sex about 3-4 times a week. However, I find myself fantasizing about and sometimes flirting with other women. I'm torn between wanting to be single and wanting to continue my relationship with my girlfriend. (And honestly, if you asked me, "What do YOU want? I'd say: BOTH!) We've discussed this problem together, and have decided to play our relationship "by ear." My girlfriend once had the expectation of us getting married, but now she says if we were to break up she'd be comfortable with us always staying best friends. A couple of months ago, we did break up, however we continued living together. The break-up lasted a week--with each of us completely ostracizing the other. No touches, no kisses, no casual sex, etc. (We were basically as closed to 'broke up' as one could while living with the other). She hated the break up and so did I. After a week and many tears, we got back together. Two months later, I feel I am in the same state of mind I was before the break up. Any suggestions or ideas as to what to do? I'm hoping for (male) responders who have had similar experiences (if you haven't been in a relationship, please don't theorize ). Are the feelings I'm having "normal?" Are there men out there in committed, marital relationships that have similar feelings? How do you handle them? How do you NOT flirt with other women, when flirting comes so naturally and easy? When a woman hits on you, how do you suppress any sexual urgers? Etc. Thanks a lot! Flankert. . .
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