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So I am not finished but I would really like some feedback. Please criticize as much as needed

 

Maturity

            Maturity is defined as being able to respond to a situation appropriately, which, quite frankly, is very important in both a social and professional environment. Like many other things, maturity is part of the socialization process, the process by which people learn how to become a functional member of society. As people move about their lives, they learn the "ins and outs" of society, as well as its norms and values. While going through life, people are faced with decision making every day; whether it be what to eat or what’s the best way to make the day productive. The way in which people react to other people's decisions and actions is what defines their level of maturity, and the way in which someone presents their reaction should be in consideration of the other person. What many people think today, is that a person’s level of maturity corresponds with their age. Maturity is learned through socialization, and no matter the age one can learn handle a situation in the correct manner.

            Socialization is key to learning how to react to others. When we are younger we mimic those who are older than us. During one of my psychology classes my professor showed us an experiment that proved just this. There was a professor of psychology at Stanford University, Dr. Albert Bandura, who tested 36 young boys and 36 young girls between the ages of 3 and 6 in his experiment. This experiment was called the Bobo Doll Experiment, where Bandura showed half of the children a video of an older women playing violently with the Bobo Doll while half of them were not shown the video. The half that were shown the video, when placed in a room with the Bobo Doll and many other toys, immediately started punching and kicking the Bobo Doll. The children who watched the video also picked up a fake gun that was placed in the room and began pointing the gun at the doll and yelling vulgar things at it. The half that were not shown the video played with the other toys that were in the room and were non-aggressive towards the Bobo Doll. This experiment proved that when we are younger we react towards things the way we see others act.

            Maturity can be reduced into three things: communication, the way someone presents themselves, and the ability to adapt to a certain situation. We learn these things through observing those around us, our biggest factor being our parents. The way our parents react to us may represent how we react to others. A parent that merely grounds their kids when they do something wrong may teach their child that the best way to deal with something is to not actually deal with it at all. A parent who always screams at the child, and does not allow them to explain themselves may end up with a child who hides their wrong doings instead of owning up to what they have done. A way to prevent this is for a parent to develop communication between their child and themselves. This allows the child to learn to own up to what they have done and learn how to explain themselves. This accounts for communication.

            The way we present ourselves also plays a large role in our level of maturity. We must present ourselves in way that shows we respect ourselves and those around us. We can do this by the way we dress, the way we walk, and the way we look at people. People who dress more conservatively would be thought to respect themselves, and therefor respect those around them. If someone is walking with their “nose in the air” as they sway their hips it puts off an image of “I am too good for you.” They are showing that they do not have much regard for the feelings of those around them, and learning to put others first is a big component is maturity. If a high school student walks into a class wearing a vulgar shirt, and sits on a desk while chomping on gum and throwing a paper airplane across the room, one could presume that they do not have respect for the classroom and therefor have not reached maturity. If someone walks in wearing conservative clothes and sits down facing the teacher it could be assumed that they are showing respect and have reached maturity.

            The biggest ways to show maturity is the way someone reacts to a situation; this is because communication and the way we present ourselves are both factors in our reaction. Returning to the example of the students in the classroom, we can look at the reaction of the teacher to these students as a representation of their maturity. If the teacher reacts by yelling the student saying they have an immediate referral without giving the student a chance to redeem themselves, the teacher is showing they he or she has no care in trying to better the child. If the teacher reacts by asking them to politely sit down in the seat and explains that doing it again would result in a referral it is showing a level of respect for the student and allowing him or her to redeem themselves. 

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Quite a few interesting points.  I would submit that you are focusing on a specific type, aspect, consequence or side effect of maturity.  A person who has matured to become independent, rational, and with a healthy self-esteem, will exhibit many of the positive qualities you identify above in their dealings with others.

Maturity itself is far broader than merely its social aspects.

My suggestion (in the spirit of your request for a critique) is that either

1. the piece be expanded to encompass all aspects of maturity; or

2. The piece be titled to indicate it really is about mature relationships with others.

In either case I would suggest including more fundamental principles, morality, virtues, self interest, to illustrate the creation and manifestation of maturity.

 

I also note, perhaps you may have inadvertently posted in the wrong forum.

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21 hours ago, Courtney Bradshaw said:

            The way we present ourselves also plays a large role in our level of maturity. We must present ourselves in way that shows we respect ourselves and those around us. We can do this by the way we dress, the way we walk, and the way we look at people. People who dress more conservatively would be thought to respect themselves, and therefor respect those around them. If someone is walking with their “nose in the air” as they sway their hips it puts off an image of “I am too good for you.” They are showing that they do not have much regard for the feelings of those around them, and learning to put others first is a big component is maturity. If a high school student walks into a class wearing a vulgar shirt, and sits on a desk while chomping on gum and throwing a paper airplane across the room, one could presume that they do not have respect for the classroom and therefor have not reached maturity. If someone walks in wearing conservative clothes and sits down facing the teacher it could be assumed that they are showing respect and have reached maturity.

Who's your audience? I mean, you said "putting others first is a big component to maturity", and I don't know if you're trying to make your writing get broader appeal, or if you are supporting an altruistic standard.

The rest of this is good writing. It only gets weak at the paragraph I quoted. You explained with examples why you think people learn about maturity from others a lot of the time. That was good. Here, you're out of nowhere saying conservative dressing is part of maturity, without anything but an assertion that this must be so. Self-presentation is important, but you aren't really saying -why- it is self-respect, or what would be a sign of disrespect. Notice you said "it could be assumed" in the last sentence.

Edited by Eiuol

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