Objectivist Views On Divorce

[DrBaltar]

"Dr Baltar", As a dad, you've probably figured out that kids are extremely resilient when it comes to what adults would term "emotionally traumatic" events. Even when their immediate reaction to a loss is very strong, they are able to pick up and get on with life without looking back. So, in the long-run, I wouldn't worry about the kids.

When my oldest daughter was 2, she freaked out when we moved the table, chairs & refrigerator out of the kitchen to replace the kitchen floor lol. We had a flood that nearly came into our house when she was 5. She still gets nervous when it rains. I know they can be resilient at some things, but sometimes events have lasting effects. But I know what you're saying.

Indeed, the biggest question there is not how much they will miss you, but how much you will miss them.

I don't want to leave them. I want at least 50% custody of them. In TX courts usually rule for joint custody. But it actually works out that the father gets 30-40% custody. I could not go for that. I would miss them even with 50% custody. I'm really involved with them now, and so I'll make records showing how much I actually do, and argue in court that it would be in the children's best interest to stay with me at least 50% of the time. I don't know if that will work, but hopefully it will be enough to convince my wife that it will be a tough fight and just to settle for 50/50.

[Rex Little]

That's one of the reasons I encouraged her to go back to work. Divorce is expensive, and she'll need some income if I do divorce her.

I don't know if you've already thought of this, but if she's working it will also cut down on the alimony you have to pay. The amount is based on the difference between your income and hers, at least if family law in Texas is anything like California.

[DrBaltar]

Yeah, I considered that too. In TX there is no alimony if you've been married less than 10 years (we're married 12) and beyond that, only if the spouse can show a need. If she already has an income, she's fine. There is child support though.

Edited January 6, 2006 by DrBaltar

[scottkursk]

Yeah, I considered that too. In TX there is no alimony if you've been married less than 10 years (we're married 12) and beyond that, only if the spouse can show a need. If she already has an income, she's fine. There is child support though.

In Texas child support is usually 20% of your pay for 1 child, 25% for 2 children, etc.capping at 40% or 6k. But you usually have to do something seriously extreme to get that high of an amount. Unless there is extreme cirumstances ie spousal abuse, then there isn't a real chance for spousal support. Also, while joint custody is the norm, I think it's offically something like Joint Conservatership. Usually, one spouce (almost always the wife now) in the managing convservator has actual physical custody of the child while the possesory conservator have visitation rights.

So, her working does somewhat reduce your chances for managing convservatorship slightly, it does mean that she'll be better off as will your kids. Also, that is a bit of brinkmanship that can ruin the divorce and make it uglier. Nobody benefits in the long run from that.