Jump to content
Objectivism Online Forum

The Banana: Proof of God's Creation

Rate this topic


Recommended Posts

And God is aware that the fact we eat and breathe out of the same hole (the mouth), meaning he intended for some humans to be able to choke due to this..

And He designed women's input and output ports too close to each other. He also made babies' heads too big to fit easily in the human birth cannal He designed (probably one design team worked in Metric and the other in Imperial). And He sure as hell dind't include a warranty for any of us.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Replies 71
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Yeah, by one team you would mean one of Gods multiple personalities, one that refused to work in Imperial, while the other one worked in Metric.

*Rings God*...

"Yes..I would like to make a complaint about one of your products...the head of a baby. Its too big and birth canal is too small! I recommend that you change one of those in future models! ........... What? You do not do revisions on that product line anymore? DAMN!"

Edited by Prometheus98876
Link to post
Share on other sites
Yeah, by one team you would mean one of Gods multiple personalities, one that refused to work in Imperial, while the other one worked in Metric.

Why not? Religionists assure me God is omnipotent, not bound by human notions of logic or reason. He can contradict Himself and reality if He so chooses, can He not? If not, why bother being God.

BTW Here's a God joke:

When Wolfgang Pauli died, God Himself was there to greet him. He offered to answer one question the famed physicist might have. Pauli asks:

"Tell me, Lord, why does the electron/proton mass ratio has the value it does? Every hypothesis I've seen on the subject is dead wrong."

"Certainly," replies God, handing Pauli a thick sheaf of papers. "Here is the explanation in terms of mid-20th Century physics and mathematics."

Pauli reads through it, sighs and says "Still wrong!"

Oh, well. Here's another one:

A very old man arrives in heaven. He's so old he can't remember much about himself, not even his name. various angeals try to ellicit information, then give up. Finally Jesus goes to see him.

"You must remember something, my friend," Jesus says. "If not about yourself, then about what you used to do. What was your profession?"

The old man thinks for a while, then says "I was a carpenter. yes, I'm sure that's what I did."

"You see? Now tell me, where did you practice carpentry?"

The old man sits silently for a while and finally says "I don't remember."

"Well, that's ok. Maybe you remember something about those you loved. Tell me, did you have a family?"

"Yes," the old man answers at once.

"Good! Now we're getting somewhere. Did you have a son?"

"Yes," says the old man. "I remember now. I had a son. A very famous young man, he was. All the world knew his name."

Jesus stands up with arms outstretched and says "Father!"

The old man embraces him, saying "Pinocchio!"

Link to post
Share on other sites
It involved me having heaps of hundred dollar bills that I had earned.

Wait... is that really all that scary?

He has a divine plan? I could have sworn he was making it up as he went along...

The Bible certainly make it seem like he makes it up as he goes along.

Go to this page and read the "Christians" section. What really gets me, if Eve was not made by god to be a sexual companion for Eve but a companion, why would he both give them sexual organ, especially since it seems unlikely God would have wanted those two to have sex for pleasure. So what purpose did sexual organs serve? This proves God is a rather silly designer if you ask me...

So Stupid Design not Intelligent Design? Sounds about right to me. It doesn't sell so well, though.

This is where the religious guys have a tough time explaining things. They usually come up with something like: "God wanted to test man", even though they know that God ought to have known how things were going to turn out (if he's all that omniscient), so what kind of sham test was that?

Seems to me that he was setting man up for failure.

Ah, God, you f'd up with Creation. There are many things wrong with it. It makes your beloved creatures, which you claim to love equally even though you don't act like it, suffer.

Link to post
Share on other sites

LOL! Yeah sounds about right, God does seem to forget a lot of important things...

They would probably just claim God works in mysterious ways. Thats true..what is more mysterious than a guy whom can do whatever he likes? If the laws of reality get in his way? He can just screw with them until the crows come home...unless he chooses for them never to come home.

Link to post
Share on other sites
LOL! Yeah sounds about right, God does seem to forget a lot of important things...

They would probably just claim God works in mysterious ways. Thats true..what is more mysterious than a guy whom can do whatever he likes? If the laws of reality get in his way? He can just screw with them until the crows come home...unless he chooses for them never to come home.

What is even more mysterious is the claims that God is "good and moral". I would say "evil and immoral" not "good and moral"

Link to post
Share on other sites

True, but does is it right for him to do so? Mind you, he could change it so it is. But is that right of him to do? Same answer. He could just create an endless loop of it being right for him to do so. He is all-powerful after all, so that is easy for him.

As for the 7 days thing, some Christians claim that the "7 days" thing isn't literal. They claim that a day to God is much longer than for us. So time travels at a different speed for him? He must go at light speed or near light speed then. Easy for him to do, but why would he do it?

Link to post
Share on other sites
True, but does is it right for him to do so? Mind you, he could change it so it is. But is that right of him to do? Same answer. He could just create an endless loop of it being right for him to do so. He is all-powerful after all, so that is easy for him.

As for the 7 days thing, some Christians claim that the "7 days" thing isn't literal. They claim that a day to God is much longer than for us. So time travels at a different speed for him? He must go at light speed or near light speed then. Easy for him to do, but why would he do it?

No, not given he doesnt want to tamper with free wil perhaps.

Oh I know that, some say it is totally unreliable and say could could have taken many many years to create the universe, and that a "day" to God might be Gods knows how long (bad pun intended).

Link to post
Share on other sites
No, not given he doesnt want to tamper with free wil perhaps.

Oh I know that, some say it is totally unreliable and say could could have taken many many years to create the universe, and that a "day" to God might be Gods knows how long (bad pun intended).

He could just alter reality so free will isn't tampered with. :)

Yes, I know they do that.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Here you can find a rather interesting (but sort of silly in the sense that why would you bother going to all the effort) dispute of the Creation myth.

For instance: How did God create light before the stars, etc, which the Bible claims he did?

Hereis a good quote, which I wish Christians would listen to:

Should a conflict arise between the witness of the Holy Spirit to the fundamental truth

of the Christian faith and beliefs based on argument and evidence, then it is the former which must

take precedence over the latter, not vice versa.

With that I think I have been in this thread about long enough now unless something really, really interesting arises.

Edited by Prometheus98876
Link to post
Share on other sites

What the hell I? This is too good to pass up..

I assume he means jars that you freshly open (and were properly sealed). But what about the fact that if you leave it open life that is not detectable will eventually arise?

What they are the going to say next, life has not evolved on Mars (after all they claim the universe is entirely suitable for life), there evolution must be wrong?

Or that evolution is itself a miracle because only on Earth does it seem to be possible and therefore evolution proves Gods existence?

Link to post
Share on other sites
What the hell I? This is too good to pass up..

I assume he means jars that you freshly open (and were properly sealed). But what about the fact that if you leave it open life that is not detectable will eventually arise?

What they are the going to say next, life has not evolved on Mars (after all they claim the universe is entirely suitable for life), there evolution must be wrong?

Or that evolution is itself a miracle because only on Earth does it seem to be possible and therefore evolution proves Gods existence?

Of course they will claim that. These are people willing to claim any and every delusion after all, provided it fits in with their God delusion. Ones that don't get the axe.

Edited by DragonMaci
Link to post
Share on other sites

According to the Christian Dictionary:

Facts: something that actually exists, reality, truth. Unless it happens that it would contradict my claims, then it is no longer applicable.

LOL..no just kidding but you would think so though...

Link to post
Share on other sites
I rather think that moron is forgetting quite a few simple facts, but then what should we expect from someone who hates facts?

Indeed. Facts are inconcient to people like him.

According to the Christian Dictionary:

Facts: something that actually exists, reality, truth. Unless it happens that it would contradict my claims, then it is no longer applicable.

LOL..no just kidding but you would think so though...

Actually, they act like they define the word that way. Maybe the actually do. :D

Link to post
Share on other sites
Here is their definiton of proof:

"To make an arbitary, baseless statement, loosely connected with reality, back it up with irrelevent side-issues and wait for morons to buy it'

That sounds about right.

Here is their definition of reality:

"Anything that exists, except that which contradicts the Bible."

Link to post
Share on other sites
Nearly..it is actually:

That which exists, but which God can change whenever he wants to cover his or any of his followers asses.

That, too, I suppose. It goes something like this:

"Everything that exists, except that which contradicts our stories, which God will change so that it doesn't."

Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.


×
×
  • Create New...