On Teenagers And Expression Of Sexuality

[AmbivalentEye]

On Teenagers and Expression of Sexuality

How old do you think I am? Truthfully, I am 16! And I have come to the decision that despite a common taboo of youths and sexual expression, I am here to talk about SEX. Does this statement scare you? Does it make you uneasy? I find it absurd that in a society of so many freedoms, we teenagers are still suppressed from our ability to express our own opinions, ideas, and feelings about our personal states of life. I have found that this is actually essential to our lives. Communication, I mean. Through communication and self-expression, a developing adolescent learns about the world, him/herself, but most importantly, this adolescent receives insight into varying perspectives that assist in creating the fundamental principles of our lives.

Adolescence, according to the Florida Developmental Psychology Association, is a crucial time period of physical, intellectual, social, and emotional change in everybody’s life. This development occurs in the context of family, peers, community, but most importantly, from a renewed concept of oneself. Studies of high schools throughout the nation, done by the Alder’s institute in 1992, ’96, ’98, and 2004, show that the main problem is communication. Governmental agencies for the past decade have attempted to fix the problem by enforcing sex-ed in secondary education. Has this really helped? Partly, but not specifically. What this society needs is for adolescents to come out of their shell. Teenagers should have the freedom as well as the guiltlessness to openly and maturely discuss sexual concepts and feelings. Why don’t they? Primarily, because it makes adults uncomfortable. For example, we have spent years hearing all sorts of parents and guardians advocate the safety and naturalness of masturbation, and yet, only a very rare minority has ever chosen to acknowledge the fact that nearly every single one of their sons has done it. Communication is the number one means to assemble personal concepts and standards. Discussion is one of the most significant factors in the establishment of personal morals because in this manner, not only are you learning new information, but you also see differing perspectives and can set the foundation to your own ethics.

There are an estimated 10 stages to adolescence. The beginning phases include physical maturity, increased empathy and desire, and the desire to learn and be guided. It can very well be accepted that adolescents do not simply learn by being downloaded a bunch of facts. The gradual learning processes include, but are not limited to, increased attention, pursued interests, personal curiosity as well as extra-personal curiosity, the realization of sexual preference and orientation, experimentation, and exchange of ideas. Through all of these means, the adolescent learns what exactly sexuality is, how it plays a role in their life, and what decisions are appropriate regarding the matter. My belief is that none of these processes should be suppressed, because the result of such an act, as can be seen today, is a growing population of teens that hate their bodies and their desires because they don’t specifically understand what has happened to them or why these changes are so significant. Any sex-ed course can instruct these students on “what” happens. But the truth is that this country has neither the time, nor the money to establish programs that could answer all of the in-depth analysis of why. Why is it alright for a woman to be prone to emotions and a guy cannot? Why is it that women seem to hold greater value for sexual acts than men do? This isn’t science or some sort of physiology. I’m talking about psychological development and the unfulfilled needs of the teenage individual and how those needs affect his/her life. Sexual expression is the key to resolving all of these personal conflicts. If teenagers had more liberty to speak their minds about the state they are in and their perspectives, then members of society would finally have a thorough understanding of one another. We are no longer in puritan times. I shall not be branded with a scarlet letter for admitting to the act of masturbation, but societal standards have made it so that I can expect a strange look from you upon mentioning it.

When I refer to sexual expression, I am referring specifically to the freedom to speak, to write, to create; some of the same intrinsic principles that this nation was founded on. Teens should be able to talk to one another about sexual concerns, they should be able to express their natural sexual frustrations and desires in constructive ways such as literature, artwork, crafts, and they should also never be scorned for the natural processes of personal curiosity and experimentation that they have as long as it remains within a discreet and appropriate setting.

I am not here to promote sex or social anarchy. I believe that we are all very complex creatures, and as such, it is vital for us, especially as teenagers, to comprehend all of these intricacies early on, from individual experience and analysis. We should have the freedom to express our sexuality. We, as youths, should strive for that level of maturity, such as adults should strive for the same maturity in listening to what we have to say.

(I hate how the beginning is right now. If you have any comments or suggestions, please let me know. Again, this is a speech I have to make for a debate tournament. -J)

[softwareNerd]

What's the topic for the tournament?

One thing about the opening is that if you are delivering the speech in person, it might be clear that you're about 16. If so, "truthfully, I'm 16" would have no drama.

Option 1: I give this advice hesitantly, but: You could try to start with a demonstration of your theme, by saying something that will make people wonder if they should squirm (just a little). Not sure what ages of students are in the audience, so be mindful of proper etiquette even while you are protesting it. Also, I figure the judges might penalize you if you went for a really shocking opening. I don't know about your school and the standards, but worse could happen. So, take that as a caveat emptor, and stay within "lines" that you know will be acceptable. With all that warning under the belt, many possible openings come to mind.

Option 2: On the other hand, you can go for an opening where everyone knows what you are speaking about, and yet you don't break any speech codes. Something along these lines:

"Do you know what I enjoy? Let me list a few: I like reading, and skateboarding and music. I love hiking. It is not cool to admit it, but sometime I enjoy hanging out with my mom and dad. I'm 16, I enjoy lots of things other 16 olds do. But... there is one thing I really enjoy that I am not allowed to talk about. It isn't something bad. Everyone tells me it's healthy. I can talk of other healthy things, but this one topic is banned. It doesn't hurt anyone else, this thing I love so much. My parents and teachers say it is normal. Some even imply it might not be normal if I didn't like it. Then, why can't I talk about it?"

[AmbivalentEye]

What's the topic for the tournament?

One thing about the opening is that if you are delivering the speech in person, it might be clear that you're about 16. If so, "truthfully, I'm 16" would have no drama.

Option 1: I give this advice hesitantly, but: You could try to start with a demonstration of your theme, by saying something that will make people wonder if they should squirm (just a little). Not sure what ages of students are in the audience, so be mindful of proper etiquette even while you are protesting it. Also, I figure the judges might penalize you if you went for a really shocking opening. I don't know about your school and the standards, but worse could happen. So, take that as a caveat emptor, and stay within "lines" that you know will be acceptable. it?"

The tournament doesn't have a topic, it has a bunch of events. Last week I was in Congress and I posted a speech on Amnesty here too. I GOT THIRD PLACE AT THE TOURNAMENT! but they only award 1st and 2nd. It was out of 15 total speakers presenting Bills.

This week I'm doing Original Oratory. I have to present some sort of social problem or social criticism and then talk about it for 8 minutes. I have to do this speech on Saturday so I like getting opinions here. Thank you for your comment. I actually did change the speech cause I hated the beginning. I ended up doing a thing around the childish concept of Sex as "IT" and worked my way into the text.

Also, the age range is from 14 to about 18 year olds. All, or most of the judges are parents or school staff that volunteer. I'm just hoping I won't get one of those pro-abstinence republican mothers, cause then I'd be screwed. I wanted to purposely make my topic controversial. I even added a line at the begining of my second paragraph that says, "So, how about we get into an orgy of self-analysis". The speeches are supposed to be slightly humorous for emphasis and to get popular attention from the crowd. It also has to be completely memorized so I have to work on that now. Thanks for everything. Bye!

-J

[colin]

If this is a tournament that is being judged by adults, I would start by resisting the temtation of casting adults as the bad guy with respect to the perceived issue that you are discussing. It may have been unintentional, but you seem to be suggesting that adults are unwilling or afraid to allow teens to discuss sex. That may be true, but it may only be a perception and may not apply to the adults that are judging you.

we have spent years hearing all sorts of parents and guardians advocate the safety and naturalness of masturbation, and yet, only a very rare minority has ever chosen to acknowledge the fact that nearly every single one of their sons has done it.

Is that true? Or is it a straw man that you have constructed to fit with your argument. Most of the adults that I know would be shocked to hear anyone say that a teenager didn't masturbate. It is often better when arguing a position on an issue to avoid casting your judges as the cause of the problem as opposed to a part of the solution.

As a general comment, although you may have identified an issue that is worthy of discussion, your argument as to the cause of the problem is one-sided. Do teenagers not have any responsibility for the problem? To adults actually prevent teens from discussing sex? Do teens not have the liberty to discuss sex? Do most/many parents not discuss sex with their teens at all? These premises appear absurd.

Good luck.

[AmbivalentEye]

JUST AS AN UPDATE:

I got 4th place at the tournament out of 10 people. Only the top 3 are recognized though. I had a great time though. The judges actually admired me for picking such a controversial topic. They said I had a problem with my nervousness, because it was making my sentences choppy, but that I'd get through that as the year goes along.

Thanks for your comments,

-J.