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I HATE other people

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I've read The Fountainhead and some of The Philosophy of Ayn Rand, and I am applying the philosophy in my life to the best of my abilily. I realize that I do not have a thorough understanding of Objectivism, and I am striving to learn more about it. I have encountered a hurdle in my "intellectual redevelopment", however (For lack of a better term): I loathe other people. I hate the people I coexist with as much as a person can hate anything.

I cannot overstate my hatred for my classmates. I am eighteen years old, and a senior in High School. I loathe how everything seems to be a game, nothing is to be taken seriously. I hate the girl who tells me I should "lighten up": I want to hit her with a baseball bat. I am insulted by how she and everyone I go to school with expects me to surrender every principle I hold dear for the sake of a laugh. I don't find racist jokes funny in the slightest, even if you are "just kidding", I don't find an eighteen-year-old that acts like a child humorous, and quite frankly, you subhumans of the world, I couldn't possibly care any less about whether you agree with me or not about anything at all.

I get home every day feeling drained: it is very tiresome to feel hate towards just about every human being you encounter, save two. I try to analyze why I feel so negative towards other people, but I can find no certain answer through this introspective investigating. One theory that I have includes my present inability to achieve economic independence from my altruist-collectivist mother. Am I projecting my anger to others who don't live up to my standards? Have any of you ever felt this way?

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Yes; there was a time in my life that I hated everyone and everything because I had no control whatsoever over my life and no control over the people that dictated my life. I fought back via endless, pointless rebellion; rebellion for the sake of rebellion. When I was exhausted, I would hide in my room or vanish into the streets for long hours.

The state of constant, vicious rage is something you have to work through for yourself. Just know it can be done, and it's WORTH IT.

Two things that helped me: you can't change people, and they can't control you. The fact that other people are stupid doesn't mean that YOU are stupid, or that EVERYONE is stupid. For now, you may be forced to think of them as distant lights on the dark earth, far away and unreachable, but they are there, and you can reach them.

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It seems like you identify with being somebody who hates everybody, and you let this view of yourself affect your future judgments of people. What do you expect to gain from your classmates, as you described them? Do you think that the value of accepting them for what they are and then ignoring them is greater than continually expecting something from them that they can't give you?

Oh, and lighten up. :D

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Dude, I know how that goes man, I myself was like that in High School in many ways. I was always thinking that there was something wrong with me because I didn't fit in. I wasn't like other people in any shape and form. I didn't know what was wrong with me. Did I hate everyone, no, but I know how that goes man. The best thing to do though is to stay rational, make sure you don't do anything Irrational, such as using that baseball bat. This won't solve anything and only create its own problems. Continue your research of Objectivism. Come here for questions and they will be answered very well. If you are finding you are having problems with students try to ignore them to the best of your ability or find away of making them leave you alone, that doesn't involve a baseball bat, use that rational mind that you have to think of a solution, what you are doing is thinking of the problem. Don't focus on the problem this will solve nothing, understanding the problem is good, but think of a solution to that problem.

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...I loathe other people. I hate the people I coexist with as much as a person can hate anything.

I cannot overstate my hatred for my classmates...

I can certainly understand where you are coming from. People can get very, very irritating. The best advice I can offer is: stick to your principles and don't really concern yourself with anyone else. If you hate them so much, why give them any thought at all? They don't have to matter.
We never had to take any of it seriously, did we?

No, we never had to.

If you haven't already, read Atlas Shrugged. I found it quite uplifting.
In the name of the values that keep you alive, do not let your vision of man be distorted by the ugly, the cowardly, the mindless in those who have never achieved his title.
Keep reading and keep valuing!
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I'm not a psychologist, but speaking from personal experience, I think it's worth pointing out how much control you are allowing other people to have over your emotions. Under normal circumstances, for example, a person with healthy self-esteem should be able to handle criticism- true or false, without feeling an urge to respond with violence- a reaction that seems to suggest that he perceives his inner sense of self to be in jeopardy.

I mention this because, at the end, you claim not to care whether any "subhumans" agree with you. Yet if you don't care, why the emotional reaction when someone acts on their opposing belief? Is an eighteen-year-old who acts like a child a direct threat to you? If you don't care whether someone agrees with your rejection of racism, why would it anger you that they make jokes revealing their acceptance of racism?

I consider it brave to attempt not to let the actions and oppinions of others bother you.. but if they *do* bother you, that's not a sign of weakness, either. When other people bother you the brave thing to do is to accept your emotions, and not bury and repress them, which, as you might have discovered, makes introspection almost impossible.

You might consider speaking to a professional psychologist about it- even a bad one might give you good ideas on how to solve your anger "problems" (if they're a problem for you, which you seem to think they are).

That being said, my opinion of other people- and the potentiality of meeting people like me-- specifically, honest, rational, happy people, increased exponentially when I attended my first Objectivist lecture and met other people interested in Objectivism.

Edited by Bold Standard
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Hey dude, I'm in high school too. Welcom to the site.

Anyway, as to your specific problem I can sort of relate. I'm kind of an outcast, but that is because I want to be. I used to wonder why I wasn't popular and then concluded it was because I didn't wantto be. I don't hate other people, I just don't care about what they think. That is your problem right there. As Elie Wiesel said, "The opposite of love is not hate; it is indifference." And being indifferent to those around will, in my experience, give you the most happiness. Also, when someone asks you to compromise, just ask why. They won't be able to answer, and then you can tell the truth about compromise. As others said, do not act irrationally. It is never in your rational self-interest to act irrationally. :D

Don't compromise and don't give up hope in others. I haven't ever met another Objectivist in person either. Some people drive me crazy; I just avoid them.

Another key: always be completely, brutally honest. :D Then, people who don't like that will avoid you, and people who do value honesty will come to you.

One more thing (if this applies to you); try to be at least cordial to others. It may help them and you. :) I try to think of it like this: Would a person with as great a self-esteem as I have really need to degrade others? My answer is no.

Zak

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Yes; there was a time in my life that I hated everyone and everything because I had no control whatsoever over my life and no control over the people that dictated my life.  I fought back via endless, pointless rebellion; rebellion for the sake of rebellion.  When I was exhausted, I would hide in my room or vanish into the streets for long hours.

I think Jennifer was on the ball here when she mentioned a lack of control. I think the most important thing you can have in regards to self-esteem is control of your inner thoughts. When dealing with these people who make you angry, it is vital to stay fully conscious and don't get pressured into dealing with these people on their terms. I can't say whether this applies to you, but I felt anger at people when I was in highschool, and it was due to being helpless because I THOUGHT I was unable to use the only thing I had - my reason - in order to deal with them. I didn't understand what made everyone else tick. What I didn't know is that they didn't know either; they were acting by immitation and probably never once woke up to question why they acted the way they acted. A person of integrity would never allow themselves to immitate other people, and perhaps wouldn't conceive that someone could be so base as to let themselves do it. Yet, sadly, it is very common.

The solution when dealing with these people is to stay on the conceptual level, and control your own INNER state. A person who is control of his mental faculties is in control of himself, and it will show. If someone starts being irrational, speak out! Ask them "How can you lighten up about something so serious?". Ask them "Why don't you take ideas seriously? Don't you take yourself seriously?". Show them that you are impervious to being reduced to their animal level; that you will always and only deal with them in rational, conceptual terms. They will then have no choice but to either engage you in a rational discussion or leave you alone. If they engage you, it requires an eternal vigilance on your part. Point out ALL their mistakes. Have no shame in telling them your exact thoughts as they come to you.Don't dumb your speech down to talk in "their kind of language".

Take note of their demeanour: Are they acting like a cornered animal that has no choice but to resort to brute force, or are they nodding with avid interest and showing an indication of actual thought? Take this into account, and don't be defensive if you don't see them being offensive. If they resort to implicit threats of force (this is more likely in highschool than college), again, speak out: "Are you threatening me? Because if so, don't be a coward: tell me." You will hit them right where it hurts, because they ARE cowards. If they say "No." and you know they are lying, don't give up, say "I think you are. Why don't you be honest and tell me the truth? Are you so ashamed that you don't want these people to see that you can't deal with me by use of your brain, only by implied threats of violence? Why are you towering over me like that? Can't you be a man and sit down?". These people are afraid of using their own minds, and are afraid of you because you use yours. You can put them to shame by doing this. If they don't back down, just remain on the conceptual level. Verbally spell out any implied threat. Call them out on it. Don't give them permission for them to use their threats as the substitute of an argument. Don't be the man who is intimidated, the man who would respond to their animalistic posturing.

I wish I had came to this knowledge in highschool. It was there the whole time, but I was so shamed out of using my mind that I never discovered it. There is an endless torrent of pressure demanding that I give in and conform, but you will only feel that pressure when you lapse in the use of your mind, when you fail to recognise that there is nothing wrong with using your mind 100% of the time in any situation. What makes a man like Roark - a man who not only doesn't yield, but seemed positively naive about the notion of yielding? The answer is: He remained on the conceptual level. Force and mind are opposites - when you remain in a conscious state, and never once abstain from the act of thinking, your mind will be impervious to force - or peer pressure.

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I will say that I agree with what everyone else stated already, and I will add that it gets easier in College (if you're planning to go) I know I hated High School and pretty much everyone in it, but I found College to much more diverse. There will still be the people you hate there too (there's no getting rid of them!), but there will, probably, be more people on your level, holding the same values you do.

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Hopefully your hatred is grounded in rational values. One way to check yourself is if you have something to show for it, like achievement, or at least passionately oriented realistic goals. If you have those things, that is the part of YOU that you can go to when other people get you down. That's what Roarke had. That's why other people could only dig in to him so far, to a point, and the rest was his diamond soul. Also, it's likely that you can find people who share similar values. It would be very suprising if you couldn't, even in notoriously difficult Highschool years.

Edited by unskinned
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Others here have covered everything very well but let me add this. Even if you don't have anyone in your life you can talk to, you have the people on this forum. I find that if I am having a bad day, I can come here and just read some people of like minds thoughts and it seems to cheer me up. You at least know about Objectivism in HS, I learned about it much later to my dismay.

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I've read The Fountainhead and some of The Philosophy of Ayn Rand, and I am applying the philosophy in my life to the best of my abilily. I realize that I do not have a thorough understanding of Objectivism, and I am striving to learn more about it. I have encountered a hurdle in my "intellectual redevelopment", however (For lack of a better term): I loathe other people. I hate the people I coexist with as much as a person can hate anything.

Your definition of "hate" will change as you find out what REALLY qualifies as things that deserve being "hated". The things you "hate" now are mere annoyances, and annoyances that are there to teach you.

I cannot overstate my hatred for my classmates. I am eighteen years old, and a  senior in High School. I loathe how everything seems to be a game, nothing is to be taken seriously. I hate the girl who tells me I should "lighten up": I want to hit her with a baseball bat. I am insulted by how she and everyone I go to school with expects me to surrender every principle I hold dear for the sake of a laugh. I don't find racist jokes funny in the slightest, even if you are "just kidding", I don't find an eighteen-year-old that acts like a child humorous, and quite frankly, you subhumans of the world,  I couldn't possibly care any less about whether you agree with me or not about anything at all.
I believe someone above has pointed out that allowing yourself to be insulted by others irrationality is you giving them control of you.

If you can explain to yourself how giving control of yourself to others IS a good idea, then you might have a case for being insulted.

I get home every day feeling drained: it is very tiresome to feel hate towards just about every human being you encounter, save two. I try to analyze why I feel so negative towards other people, but I can find no certain answer through this introspective investigating. One theory that I have includes my present inability to achieve economic independence from my altruist-collectivist mother. Am I projecting my anger to others who don't live up to my standards?  Have any of you ever felt this way?

How you feel is universal. Some people feel it for 10 minutes at age 12. Others for

longer or shorter periods.

Your expenditure of energy as "hate" is nonproductive. So I think we can have

you simply stop doing that.

So, instead of "doing hate", what shall we fill that time with? How about finding out

what you value, as the pursuit of happiness (value), which is what humans DO, if

they are rational, which I take it you like to consider yourself, requires you to

know what it is you're values are.

Check out how to find your values somewhere on this site. It's in here somewhere.

Once you know what it is you value, find ways to get those things in a way that

doesn't subvert those values, which means find ethical ways to act.

Check out what is ethical acting on this site.

What you'll find is that when you know what your values are, and how to act

ethically, the annoying people that you waste energy "hating" right now, will

become amusing examples of weird irrational freaks that do not threaten you, and

therefore are unworthy of your attention (execpt as the jokes that they are).

Your life, which feels to you now as being "wasted" (sucked dry of joy) by the

irrational weirdness of other people, will then become a series of integrated acts,

by you, of righteous striving for your values and happiness.

So, don't lighten up,.. listen up..! Listen to the irrationality of your own behavior,

and change it to become a rational being. :)

You're a gem. KNOW IT..!

-Iakeo

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Your life, which feels to you now as being "wasted" (sucked dry of joy) by the

irrational weirdness of other people, will then become a series of integrated acts,

by you, of righteous striving for your values and happiness.

So, don't lighten up,.. listen up..! Listen to the irrationality of your own behavior,

and change it to become a rational being.  :)

You're a gem. KNOW IT..!

-Iakeo

Wow...I have this brand new idea for an Objectivist after school special. :)

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A person of integrity would never allow themselves to immitate other people, and perhaps wouldn't conceive that someone could be so base as to let themselves do it. Yet, sadly, it is very common.

Eh? According to Ayn Rand integrity is acting on one's convictions. So this would be more irrational than a lack of integrity.

As long as the person your are trying to immitate has good convictions, what is wrong with it? Are you taking immitate to mean do everything that person does (clothes, aethetics, job, etc) or is immitate trying to be like that person?

Just wondering.

Zak

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According to Ayn Rand integrity is acting on one's convictions. So this would be more irrational than a lack of integrity.

As long as the person your are trying to immitate has good convictions, what is wrong with it?

In this case I'm refering to immitation without evaluation; i.e. second-handedness. Imitation by itself is irrational (a failure to use one's mind in order to determine whether the act should be immitated or not).

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I shall share with you my secret, but don't tell anyone else... :)

The way I deal with people is to make jokes of everything. I don't consider many things in the social realm to be worth my thought. In H.S. I had the same issue, tried to take things seriously, but all it did was backfire.

So I reverted to the role of class clown--and w/o this role, I doubt I would have graduated.

Anyhow, God Bless ( :) ), and good luck.

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I was the same way in high school and most of college. I took mostly honors courses in high school, so I was sheltered from the stupid people. I dreaded my government/economics and bible classes because they were not honors and I was forced to put up with all the shallow kids in my school. Same way in college...the most important things to people in high school and college are getting drunk, getting high, and getting laid. Very, very few people actually try to exercise their minds and I feel nothing but contempt for them.

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I cannot overstate my hatred for my classmates. I am eighteen years old, and a  senior in High School. I loathe how everything seems to be a game, nothing is to be taken seriously. I hate the girl who tells me I should "lighten up": I want to hit her with a baseball bat. I am insulted by how she and everyone I go to school with expects me to surrender every principle I hold dear for the sake of a laugh.

Why not focus on yourself instead of everyone else? Don't you have goals of your own, for yourself?

I couldn't possibly care any less about whether you agree with me or not about anything at all.

But you do. Hatred is a form of caring -- negatively. Focus instead on your own goals and working to achieve them. Eventually, you'll be so wrapped up in your own pride you won't have time to hate everyone else :P

Edited by TomL
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Why not focus on yourself instead of everyone else? Don't you have goals of your own, for yourself?

But you do. Hatred is a form of caring -- negatively. Focus instead on your own goals and working to achieve them. Eventually, you'll be so wrapped up in your own pride you won't have time to hate everyone else :)

Thank you for this. It amazes me how so frustrating a problem can be remedied by fifty-seven words on the internet by someone I've never met.

Thank you all for your replies. :P

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I took mostly honors courses in high school, so I was sheltered from the stupid people.  I dreaded my government/economics and bible classes because they were not honors and I was forced to put up with all the shallow kids in my school.  Same way in college...the most important things to people in high school and college are getting drunk, getting high, and getting laid.

You're lucky that when you were in high school (or perhaps it's where you live), honors actually meant something In my honors chemistry class the other day, my lab partner was high (:)) so I had to do all the work. That just pissed me off. :P

I have no problem with people getting high (they are obviously not my friends), but it'd be really nice if they were only in "regular" classes.

Zak

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I cannot overstate my hatred for my classmates.
The learning process is being able to form abstraction based on essential characteristics. Part of that process requires introspection. If you fail to complete that, you are not able to form abstractions.

If you have not formed the correct abstraction for hatred, when you feel "hatred" it may be sympathy for all you know. Sit down and think about why you "hate" someone until you identify what it is exactly that you feel about a person. Unitl you do that, you will never form the correct abstraction for the emotion you are having.

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Wow...I have this brand new idea for an Objectivist after school special. :)

You'll have to pardon me while I answer this call from Oprah...

"Oprah..! Hey girl..! Uh,.. Yeah. Yeah, that's.. that's my posting. Thanks! So you're

into objectivism, are you? No?! Then why... OH..!! Trolling for the word "HATE" in

caps. OK,.. makes sense.... Now, about the rights...."

-Iakeo :)

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