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Overcoming choice paralysis

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I have to make a decision. I've been putting it off for a long time because I hate the situation and all of the options and I hate even thinking about the whole thing, but it is vital that I decide, and soon. My vice seems to be that I do nothing in an attempt to preserve all options. I'll focus on one option that seems viable, but then another will occur to me and I'll get mentally overloaded trying to compare all the possibilities. A major problem is that I have to act on limited information and can only infer where a given option will lead. Does anyone have any advice for overcoming the problem of choice paralysis?

Edited by happiness
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I have to make a decision. I've been putting it off for a long time because I hate the situation and all of the options and I hate even thinking about the whole thing, but it is vital that I decide, and soon.

Everybody faces situations that we hate. Life is not all roses and sunshine. We have to do things we are inconvenienced by, dislike or hate, to achieve things we want. If I want to go to vacation in Hawaii, I have to earn the money first. Even though I would prefer to be in Hawaii and spend money, my only options, at first, are between ways to earn money. Obviously, none of those are as great as sitting in Hawaii spending it would be.

When you say that "it is vital to decide", what do you mean? What will deciding achieve? What is the "thing you want" that will be achieved by making this decision?

If you just accept that something is "vital", without tying it to a goal you are aiming for, that's not gonna work. Values are relative. Something is "vital" towards a goal. It isn't vital just for its own sake.

Edited by Nicky
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I really shouldn't be the one to give you advice, because I seem to have a variant of the same issue, but try to think over this: Even if you don't make a choice ... you've still made one.

That's the first thing that came to my mind, too. Wait. Don't choose. There are always other unseen outside the box options that will present themselves if offered the opportunity.

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That's the first thing that came to my mind, too. Wait. Don't choose. There are always other unseen outside the box options that will present themselves if offered the opportunity.

But that's just the problem (mine at least), not being conscious that not deciding is a decision; that I often don't decide in order to protect the potentially better options (which by non deciding, only exist in imagination). Or don't specialize in something because it would be destroying other options. I suspect it is a manifestation of some obsessive compulsive disorder, also linked to symmetry; it can't be rationalized, or downplayed as simple procrastination.

Edited by volco
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Yes, I need to choose a field and go back and finish.

What do you like to do?

Choose that as a field.

Don't do anything you don't like to do.

I hated school. It was degrading to sit like an inert lump forced to listen to some gasbag government subsidized public union failure. So instead of college, I chose the "outside the box" alternative of a trade that I like to do, and I work in my own business. It is a choice I have never regretted. Becoming an independent American Capitalist producer is one of the most personally satisfying career choices any man could make.

Edited by moralist
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But that's just the problem (mine at least), not being conscious that not deciding is a decision; that I often don't decide in order to protect the potentially better options (which by non deciding, only exist in imagination). Or don't specialize in something because it would be destroying other options. I suspect it is a manifestation of some obsessive compulsive disorder, also linked to symmetry; it can't be rationalized, or downplayed as simple procrastination.

There is only one reason I know of for avoiding a decision. None of the perceived choices are what you truly want to do, because what you want to do has not yet been considered as an option. When it is, there is no decision to make. You simply go and do it.

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What do you like to do?

Choose that as a field.

Don't do anything you don't like to do.

I hated school. It was degrading to sit like an inert lump forced to listen to some gasbag government subsidized public union failure. So instead of college, I chose the "outside the box" alternative of a trade that I like to do, and I work in my own business. It is a choice I have never regretted. Becoming an independent American Capitalist producer is one of the most personally satisfying career choices any man could make.

I don't have anything that I want to do. I don't even really have anything that I like to do. I know that's terrible, but the context I'm working with is about as f'd up as it's possible to get. As of now, I work a job that I dislike because it's the best one that I can get, and if I wasn't residing with my parents I'd be living hand-to-mouth. I have a physical problem that cuts me off from most of the jobs that I think would be best for me. I want to go back to school to qualify for a better job, but I just don't know which field or course of study to go for. I've been putting off the decision for a long time because I don't really see any option that I want to go forward with.

Edited by happiness
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I don't have anything that I want to do. I don't even really have anything that I like to do.

If that's true... then it doesn't really matter what you choose to do. Everyone has a calling, a purpose, something specific they do well that benefits the society in which they live. You haven't discovered what it is yet... but you will.

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I want to go back to school to qualify for a better job

Better in what way? More money? Here's a list of top ten highest paid professions: http://www.askmen.com/top_10/entertainment/top-10-highest-paying-jobs-in-the-us.html

If all you want is more money, I would suggest Nr. 4 (dentist). It probably takes the least schooling out of the ones on the list, and is by far the easiest, least stressful job on the list.

Want money and excitement? Take a look at Nr. 10 (air traffic controller).

Want money and a challenge? Pretty much all of them, except dentist. (nr. 7 looks great, because it also requires less schooling than the others on the list - though it requires a lot more effort and dedication to make it to that high paying job, than any of them except for the first two; nr. 9 is another good option).

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I don't have anything that I want to do.
What about at a really broad level? For instance, Moralist mentioned trade school. How does some type of trade seem to you, compared to some type of scientific research? How does that compare to some type of office job? Maybe you can narrow your choices a bit that way.
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What about at a really broad level? For instance, Moralist mentioned trade school. How does some type of trade seem to you, compared to some type of scientific research? How does that compare to some type of office job? Maybe you can narrow your choices a bit that way.

That's good advice...I do have a few broad ideas

Edited by happiness
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The other possibility is to start with something very specific. Take dentist. Analyze that. What would be the pros and cons? Then take Plumber and ask the same questions. Sometimes, imagining something concrete can help you think things through.

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For instance, Moralist mentioned trade school. How does some type of trade seem to you, compared to some type of scientific research?

Just to be clear, I mentioned a trade but not school. Because I hated school I chose the learning alternative of working as an apprentice. In the Army this was known as OJT... on the job training. It is by far the most efficient way to learn, because right from the beginning you are actually working and making money in the real world instead of paying money just to go through the motions in a classroom.

How does that compare to some type of office job? Maybe you can narrow your choices a bit that way.

That's a good idea. You could take note of what you hate most about various jobs, and see what's left over when you're done. In a way, that's what I did. I began by ruling out anything remotely related to school as being a total waste of time and money, and then chose from the alternatives. It made no sense to me to start out by going into student loan debt when I could start out making money. True, it isn't much in the beginning, but making even a small profit while you learn is far better than being in debt while you learn.

Edited by moralist
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Just to be clear, I mentioned a trade but not school. Because I hated school I chose the learning alternative of working as an apprentice. In the Army this was known as OJT... on the job training. It is by far the most efficient way to learn, because right from the beginning you are actually working and making money in the real world instead of paying money just to go through the motions in a classroom.

That's a good idea. You could take note of what you hate most about various jobs, and see what's left over when you're done. In a way, that's what I did. I began by ruling out anything remotely related to school as being a total waste of time and money, and then chose from the alternatives. It made no sense to me to start out by going into student loan debt when I could start out making money. True, it isn't much in the beginning, but making even a small profit while you learn is far better than being in debt while you learn.

The problem is, in today's world (where doing anything requires you to be licensed), you can't just rule out anything remotely related to school. You have to face that reality, and accept school as a potential alternative choice, to help you reach some goal you couldn't otherwise reach (i.e. get a better job).

It has nothing to do with whether on the job training is more efficient or not. It has to do with whether such on the job training exists or not. And, depending on what job you'd like, it very likely doesn't. That means it's not an option. You need to pick from the options you have, to achieve any goal.

And that's not a compromise of your ideas, by the way. You're not compromising the belief that the government requiring you to go to school before doing a job is immoral, you're just noting that they do and acting accordingly. If there was a guy shooting people in your path (and you were unarmed), would you continue on your way or go around him?

Edited by Nicky
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The problem is, in today's world (where doing anything requires you to be licensed), you can't just rule out anything remotely related to school. You have to face that reality, and accept school as a potential alternative choice, to help you reach some goal you couldn't otherwise reach (i.e. get a better job).

The alternative was just an "outside the box" suggestion from my own personal experience. I'm licensed without any schooling.

It has nothing to do with whether on the job training is more efficient or not. It has to do with whether such on the job training exists or not. And, depending on what job you'd like, it very likely doesn't. That means it's not an option. You need to pick from the options you have, to achieve any goal.

When you say "very likely doesn't", it means that unlikely options do exist. In life, some of the most interesting challenging and adventurous experiences are taking unlikely options. The road less traveled is never for everyone... only for a few.

If there was a guy shooting people in your path (and you were unarmed), would you continue on your way or go around him?

I'm armed.

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What do you like about your current job? Even if you dislike most of it, there must be some aspects you enjoy.

What do you do for fun? What activities do you enjoy? What is it about them that you like?

I second this approach. Its very important to remain value focused.

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